Monday Night Raw
March 15, 1993
Mid-Hudson Civic Center
The current WWF champs were as follows:
World Champion: Bret Hart (10/12/1992)
Intercontinental Champion: Shawn Michaels (10/27/1992)
World Tag Team Champions: Money Inc. (10/13/1992)
There’s a terrible BLIZZARD all over the northeastern US and apparently the Manhattan Center is snowed in! Somehow it’s not as bad just 80 miles north though, because we’re about to get RAW in Poughkeepsie. This marks the first episode to not take place in NYC. Enjoy!
Your hosts are Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan, and Rob Bartlett doing a horrible Vince McMahon impression. So bad, he’s just embarrassing himself. All he does right is the gravelly voice when Vince stretches out the word “Raw”, and that doesn’t really require any skills.
- Razor Ramon vs. Russ Greenberg
Short little squash. Gorilla hypes Ramon v. Backlund coming up at WrestleMania 9 while Heenan makes fun of Backlund’s age. Razor runs through his moveset and delivers the RAZOR’S EDGE for the win at 3:09.
- Typhoon vs. LA Gore
Wow, LA Gore looks like DDP’s retarded cousin. Bam Bam Bigelow was originally supposed to face Typhoon (and presumably would win), but probably could not appear due to the blizzard. However, no explanation is given. Typhoon kills Gore dead with the TIDAL WAVE for the win at 2:58.
When we come back, Bobby Heenan is supposed to be introducing Giant Gonzales and Harvey Wippleman, but has trouble with the ringside assistant. We’ll be right back!
Okay, now Bobby has things under control. Heenan introduces Gonzales as the only man to make the Undertaker look up and ask ‘what the heck has he got himself into’? Only Bobby can make this lug look interesting. Wippleman says that he certainly came through when he told the world that he had a big surprise for the Undertaker. HE TOLD YOU! HE TOLD YOU ALL! Wippleman can’t wait to show everyone how awesome Gonzales is come WrestleMania 9 because no one will agree to step in the ring beforehand with this guy. Heenan brings up the size of the casket Undertaker is currently making for Gonzales. Wippleman says the casket better be big because Gonzales is going to put not only the Undertaker inside, but also his fat friend Paul Bearer, so say goodbye to your pale destroyer! Heenan mentions the idea of perhaps a tag match between these four. Please, Bobby. Don’t give them any ideas. Last words come from Gonzales. He’s got a GIANT surprise for the Undertaker. Alright.
- Bob Backlund vs. Papa Shango
Now this is QUITE the contrast in styles. Backlund sticks and moves on Shango to start. He’s reluctant to hook up in a test of strength, but does so anyways. Once Shango has him down on his knees, Backlund escapes into an overhead wristlock. As Shango breaks loose, Backlund trips him up and elbows Shango on the forehead. Finally, Shango catches Backlund with a backbreaker to slow him down. Bartlett is starting to really get on Monsoon’s nerves with his impression. Shango headbutts the groin and grabs a chinlock. Backlund escapes with elbows, but Shango drops him with a clothesline. One big slam gets two, but a second slam is countered into a small package for the upset 1-2-3. (7:00) Doesn’t Backlund have some kind of undefeated streak going here? I can’t remember. *
It’s time for the WrestleMania IX Report with Mean Gene! Everybody will wearing togas at WrestleMania! WWF Champ Bret Hart v. Yokozuna is *your* main event. Okerlund introduces a clip from Superstars, 3/13/93 where Yokozuna gave a jobber the Banzai Drop after the match was over to show that he deserved respect. The other main event will be the Mega Maniacs with Jimmy Hart against the WWF tag champs Money Inc., who provides us with a quick word. DiBiase thinks the mask Beefcake will be wearing at WrestleMania 9 is stupid while IRS says they will have to make a special armored briefcase just for the Mega Maniacs. Also, Undertaker v. Giant Gonzales will go down. We hear from Paul Bearer and Undertaker. Soon, Giant Gonzales’ nightmare will become a reality. REST IN PEACE! In other matches, Mr. Perfect v. The Narcissist. There’s also a plethora of other great matches!
- The Nasty Boys vs. The Headshrinkers
The Nasties take turns kissing the rather large Raw girl. Heenan – “They are the Nasty Boys! I’d rather kiss the Headshrinkers.” Hey, where’s Afa? Samu attacks Knobbs early, but then he runs over Samu with a clothesline. Double back drop takes down Samu, but then Fatu comes in to double-team only for Sags to nail both the Headshrinkers with a double clothesline. Knobbs hits an armbreaker DDT on Fatu and the Nasties work the arm until Samu nails Sags from the apron who then staggers into a crescent kick from Fatu. Commercials! When we return, Sags is still getting worked over until Samu misses a flying headbutt. HOT TAG TO KNOBBS! They end up on the floor and brawling by a concession table over by the tunnel which seems incredibly out of place. That leads to the double countout as chairs are swung, popcorn gets thrown, and mustard gets splattered. (6:23 shown) Seems like they had something there with the concession stand fight. Oh well. *½
This week: What, NO KAMALA? You teases!
Next week: Unless there’s another blizzard, we’ll be back at the Manhattan Center! Money Inc. will beat some people up! Plus, Kamala meets Doink! Tatanka takes on the Repo Man! Also, The BUSHWHACKERS! Don’t miss it!