WWF: Monday Night Raw (01.01.96)
Monday Night Raw
January 1, 1996
Bob Carpenter Center
The current WWF Champs were as follows:
World Champion: Bret Hart (11/19/1995)
Intercontinental Champion: Razor Ramon (10/22/1995)
World Tag Team Champions: The Smoking Gunns (9/25/1995)
Your hosts are Vince McMahon & Jerry Lawler. There’s a band! There’s cheerleaders! It’s everything you would want in a wrestling show. Except if you loved football THIS much, you would be watching one of the bowl games instead of this anyway. Of course in wrestling, you never let logic get in the way of an idea.
- WWF Tag Team Champions The Smokin’ Gunns vs. Owen Hart & Yokozuna (w/Jim Cornette & Mr. Fuji) vs. Razor Ramon & Savio Vega vs. Psycho Sid & 1-2-3 Kid (w/Ted DiBiase) – Raw Bowl
It’s essentially a tag team elimination match with an overwhelming football theme filled with as many football puns in the commentary as you could possibly dream up. Everybody is wearing practice jerseys and ref Earl Hebner is in NFL gear – complete with a whistle! The one difference than what you normally see in an elimination match is that each team gets one timeout a piece. Throughout the night, Brother Love is praying for the boys in the Raw Bowl, even though they have already left for the ring. During his entrance, Goldust’s usher boy hands Razor Ramon a box of golden flowers. However, Razor doesn’t exactly appreciate the gift and kicks the guy back towards the dressing room while Goldust watches on and blows Razor kisses from the sidelines. Owen can’t handle Bart Gunn to start, so he quickly tags in Billy to make the SMOKING GUNNS EXPLODE! Glad they finally realized how stupid it was to be able to tag in your opponent’s own partner during these matches. They go through a fast leapfrog-hiptoss sequence and then they tag in Owen and Yoko at the same time. While Owen isn’t too excited, Yoko wants to go. Owen takes a shoulderblock and then tags in Savio. Yoko gives him a back elbow and a good slam before tagging in the Kid. SPINNING HEEL KICK on the Kid gets two. Lawler is of course hanging out with the Raw Bowl girl. He asks her what she thinks of the Cleveland Browns jersey he’s wearing. She says it’s her favorite color. HER FAVORITE COLOR IS BROWN? This chick is weird. Lots of different combinations of teams going at it in the ring with nothing too interesting happening. Savio is getting worked over real good taking us into commercial. When we return, Vega ducks out of the way of a few moves from the Kid before making the HOT TAG TO RAZOR! He wants the Kid anyways, so it works out fine. Fallaway Slam means the RAZOR’S EDGE follows, but Kid calls for a timeout! There’s no timeouts in wrestling. Ramon delivers the RAZOR’S EDGE to the Kid anyway. He covers, but the ref refuses to count and throws a flag when he sees DiBiase up on the apron. While Hebner is distracted with that, Sid runs in and clotheslines Razor down as Kid gets put on top for the 1-2-3 at 9:43 shown. Savio called for the timeout during the count, but the ref didn’t see a thing.
Owen works over Bart for a while until he misses a flying headbutt and makes the HOT TAG TO BILLY! He is a HOUSE OF FIRE now! Kid cools him off with a kick to the back of the head from the apron into a neckbreaker by Owen. Yoko heads up for the BANZAI DROP. As Owen kneels over Billy to keep him down, Bart slides Billy away from the corner and trips up Owen in the process to take the BANZAI DROP by accident. Whoops. Out goes Yoko with a dropkick. Meanwhile, Billy covers Owen for the 1-2-3 at 14:02 shown. Again, Yoko tries to get the timeout during the pinfall and the ref sees nothing.
Sid takes liberties with Billy. He whips Kid in for a dropkick in the corner and as Billy staggers out, Sid gives him a clothesline. Billy fights out of a chinlock, but runs into a big boot and a legdrop for two. He tries another comeback, but Sid grabs him for a Chokeslam. Sid knocks Bart off the apron so he and Kid can double-team Billy. As he holds Billy up, Razor Ramon runs down and shoves the Kid off the top as Billy ducks and Sid takes the flying bodypress by mistake. With Sid on the mat, Billy slides in for the cover and gets the 1-2-3 to give the victory to the Smoking Gunns. (18:31 shown) Silly, yes. Although this was as entertaining as it could possibly be for those of us football fans. **½
Welcome to the Raw Bowl halftime show with Dok Hendrix. Unlike the ones you see on the REAL bowl games, this one will only last two minutes. We first check in with Jim Ross who is outside Diesel’s dressing room. All he has to report is that Diesel says he will kick the King’s can. That was almost alliteration! Hendrix uses the last minute of our the halftime show to build the Royal Rumble in three weeks.
Now for a REAL ratings grabber, they show this…
- Hunter Hearst Helmsley vs. Henry O. Godwinn – Arkansas Hog Pen Match (IYH #5, 12/17/95)
This is the first time we’ve seen Hillbilly Jim on PPV since the ’80s. Am I right? Anyways, he’s the guest referee for this match. The point of this match is that there’s a big hog pen over by the entry way and the only way to win is to toss your opponent into the hog pen. Godwinn chases H to the floor with his slop bucket. Hunter sidesteps the toss – causing people in the front row to get slopped. In the ring, Godwinn takes over with a backdrop and ties Helmsley in the ropes to make him eat some slop. Hmm, looks like guacamole. H breaks loose and levels Godwinn with a clothesline. H follows up with a swinging neckbreaker and a knee drop. Harley Race high knee connects as they go to the floor. Godwinn elbows Hunter back and drives his head into the steps. They head over to the hog pen where Hunter takes a backdrop on the top of the fence. He jumps off for an elbow drop on Godwinn. Back to the ring, Godwinn runs into a boot in the corner and they both collapse. Godwinn counters a monkey flip into a wheelbarrow face slam. Hunter takes the Ray Stevens corner bump and then the Harley Race corner bump puts him on the floor. They brawl back over to the hog pen where Godwinn hits the SLOP DROP. With H up against the hog pen, Godwinn charges and gets flipped into the hog pen to give Hunter the win. (9:37) Well, the wrestling wasn’t so bad and the gimmick never got in the way of the match, so it’s much better than you might expect. Afterwards, Godwinn brings Hunter into the hog pen anyway with a press slam where the Blue Blood gets good and dirty. **½
- Diesel vs. King Mabel
Jeff Hardy is one of the jobbers that helps carry King Mabel to the ring. Just saying. Brother Love is STILL praying for the Raw Bowl competitors, by the way. Diesel big boots Mabel and pins him in just eight seconds. He’s making a statement that he wants to retrieve his WWF title in 1996 and no one will stand in his way. Afterwards, Diesel heads out and leaves with the Raw Bowl girl that Lawler had been flirting with all night.
In the back, Brooklyn Brawler comes into the babyface locker room and tries to present the Lombardi trophy to the Smokin’ Gunns. It’s a cheap looking trophy with a picture of Steve Lombardi taped to it. A beatdown ensues followed by a Lipton iced tea bath for the Brawler.
The first eleven Royal Rumble participants are announced. Diesel, Owen Hart, British Bulldog, Dory Funk Jr. (WWF – the NEW Generation!), Savio Vega, King Mabel, Bam Bam Bigelow (never actually happens), Barry Horowitz, Yokozuna, the returning Tatanka, and The Man They Call Vader. We get a short video package of Vader working out.
They end the program with our next installment of the “Billionaire Ted’s Wrasslin’ Warroom” promos featuring Billionaire Ted, Nacho Man, and the Huckster.
Next week: Bret v. British Bulldog from the In Your House PPV (parental discretion advised), Shawn Michaels press conference, and Hakushi v. Jarrett.
Posted on January 22, 2012, in WWE and tagged 1-2-3 Kid, Bart Gunn, Billionaire Ted, Billy Gunn, Brooklyn Brawler, Diesel, Goldust, Henry O. Godwinn, Hillbilly Jim, Jim Cornette, Mabel, Million Dollar Corporation, Mr. Fuji, Nacho Man, Owen Hart, Psycho Sid, Raw, Razor Ramon, Savio Vega, Smokin' Gunns, Ted DiBiase, The Huckster, Triple H, Yokozuna. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.