Bigelow’s Raw Report 6/8/09
Monday Night Raw 6/8/09
Announcers: Michael Cole & Jerry Lawler
– We open this post PPV episode of Raw with a recap of the buildup to and Orton/Batista cage match from last night. We then cut inside the Cajundome where we are joined by the new WWE Champion Batista. The Animal gets a solid reaction from the Louisiana faithful as he heads to the ring. He soaks in the adulation a bit before taking the mic. Last night, he beat the hell out of Randy Orton and became a five time Heavyweight Champion. He knows there is a certain sixteen time Champion watching and he wants Ric Flair to know he loves him and that he won the belt for Flair, himself and all of the fans. He also did it for everyone that was sick and tired of Randy Orton. As much as he is enjoying the moment and the title, he must say that this is only the beginning. Orton has hurt a lot of people and he will hurt Orton back. He will take his pride, his…well, we don’t find out what else as Orton makes his way out to the ramp to join in the fun. They stare each other down a bit and then Orton slowly walks down the ramp, but pauses halfway down, contemplating his next move. Batista keeps his head on a swivel and it was wise as DiBiase and Rhodes jump in the ring from behind with a chair in hand. Batista fights all three men off and tosses DiBiase and Rhodes to the floor. He loads Orton in the Batistabomb but Rhodes breaks it up with a chairshot. The three men viciously work on the left arm with DiBiase stomping on it before Orton grabs a chair and locks it on Batista’s arm. He stomps on it repeatedly as Batista screams that it will never be over and that Legacy will never get rid of him. Orton grabs the arm and wrenches it up while it is still trapped in the chair. He finally twists it violently, seemingly breaking it. Batista writhes in pain as Orton grabs the belt and holds it while he stands tall over the prone Animal. Orton walks off with the belt and the refs check on Batista as we go to break.
– When we return, the trainers are ushering Batista backstage and Big Dave says he can’t feel his arm. The trainer says he has never seen anything like this and Batista is sure it’s broken. They strap him on a stretcher and load him into an ambulance and it takes off for the hospital. After a replay of the brutal beating, we head to ringside for a quick chat with Cole and King before heading to the ring.
1) Kofi Kingston vs. William Regal in a non title match
Kofi makes his way to the ring with his new US title in tow. He won the belt last week and defended it in a four way match last night. William Regal is out now and has a mic. He says in trying times, we don’t need a Jamaican as the US champion. We need someone with dignity and class and Regal will bring that to us as Champion. Kofi takes Regal down off the bell and heads up top. Regal catches him with a shot to the gut. Regal works him over with some seated splashes and elbows for two. He drills Kofi with a kneelift and then clubs him down. He shoots Kofi to the corner, but Regal eats a boot on a charge. Kofi fires away with some rights and double chops and then puts him down with a kick to the head. Kofi nails the Boom legdrop for two. Regal avoids Kofi but Kofi ducks the running knee. Regal avoids a kick, but after some more ducking and dodging, Kofi nails the TIP for the win. I was hoping for more but they seemed to be moving in slow motion out there. Kingston d. Regal with the Trouble in Paradise; Grade: 1
– Backstage, Legacy is talking about Batista. Rhodes is certain that he is out of the way and Orton believes the arm is broken. Josh Matthews comes in and wants to know what Orton’s thoughts are. Orton says Batista is down and out and he will use hi rematch clause tonight. Either Batista comes back and fights like a man or Orton wins the title by forfeit. He tells Matthews to go confirm this information with Vickie and promises he will be WWE Champion by the end of the night. And with that, we go to break.
– When we return, we head right to the ring for some title action.
2) Kelly vs. Maryse for the Divas Championship
Michael Cole tells me the Divas are sexy, smart and powerful as Kelly heads to the ring. I say Maryse is super hot, super awesome and gets it. Ooh wee! Before the bell sounds, we are joined by Mickie James. She skips down the aisle and heads to the announce table. Maryse spikes Kelly down off the bell and Mickie tells us she just wants to get a closer look. The ladies lock up but break after the tangle on the mat. Kelly smacks Maryse but they hit a double clothesline on each other. Maryse sends Kelly careening into the ropes face first and then plants her with a backbreaker for two. Maryse slugs away but Kelly gets a sunset flip out of the corner on a Maryse charge attempt. Kelly hits a cross body off the second rope for two. She follows with a headscissors takeover for two. Kelly heads back to the middle rope but Maryse yanks her hard to the mat. She drills Kelly with a DDT and wraps her up for the win. Maryse d. Kelly with a DDT; Grade: .5
– Maryse smacks Kelly around a bit after the bell but Mickie comes in and Maryse backs off and out of the ring. Mickie blows her a kiss as we head to break.
– We are back and thanking the Sick Puppies for “You’re Going Down” which was the Extreme Rules theme as well as an official tribute song to Ahmed Johnson. Cole and King now talk a bit about last night’s Hog Pen Match and we even get a video recap of the epic showdown. Backstage, Josh Matthews is with Vickie Guerrero and inquires about Orton’s rematch. Vickie confirms what Orton said earlier as the rematch will go down tonight. She knows Batista will be back so the match is on. If Batista does not show up, Orton will be awarded the WWE Championship. Matthews thinks it is unfair, but Vickie doesn’t care. She also has an announcement tonight that will change Raw. We cut over to Maryse, who is joined by the Miz. She doesn’t care about Mickie James and then talks in French. Miz says the French speak is really hot. Maryse doesn’t need to speak French because she knows she is hot. Maryse knows Miz is a good talker, but until he beats Cena they have nothing. Miz tells her to watch his match tonight because he is the Miz and he is awesome. And I concur. We head back to ringside as the odd team of Santino, Goldust and Festus are heading out to the ring, accompanied by Hornswoggle. As they make their way out, we head to break.
– The WWE Rewind takes us back to Superstars last Thursday when Goldust & Horny picked up a win over The Brian Kendrick and Jamie Noble to keep their hot streak rolling.
3) Santino Marella, Goldust & Festus vs. Chavo Guerrero, Jamie Noble & The Brian Kendrick
We are back and Festus is all over Kendrick. He smacks him around and splashes him in the corner. He drops down with a seated splash and then works the arm. He tags in Santino, who works the arm and quickly tags Goldust. Goldust tosses Kendrick to the floor, but he sneaks back in and tags in Chavo. Chavo slugs away at Goldust and then he locks in a surfboard submission. Goldust fights up, but Chavo takes him down and tags in Noble. Noble hooks a modified cross face chicken wing as the crowd starts to rally Goldust. Goldust fights to his feet and drills Noble with an inverted atomic drop. He tags Santino, who hammers away at Noble and picks up a near fall. Festus, Chavo, Kendrick and Goldust end up brawling on the floor and Kendrick tosses Horny in the ring. He stomps on Noble’s foot and then dives out onto Kendrick. Santino sneaks up and rolls up Noble to win this bizarre little match. Marella, Goldust & Festus d. Noble, Guerrero & Kendrick when Marella pins Noble with a roll up; Grade: 1.5
– John Cena is walking backstage as we head to break.
– We are back and Miz doesn’t even wait for Lillian’s pre-match announcements as he quickly heads to the ring for what could be the biggest match of his young career. Miz has the mic and wants to know if we can feel it. This is the night we have all been waiting for: tonight Miz goes one on one with John Cena. People have been saying he is all talk, but that is Cena’s fault. He has come out week after week calling Cena out and Cena has done nothing. He thinks the Cena apologist fans are bogus and pathetic. Tonight Cena will have no excuses or injuries. The only thing separating him from going 7-0 is the most overrated wrestler in WWE. Cena is the hero to teenage girls, pre-pubescent boys and thirty year old guys living in the basement. He isn’t Tim Allen but it is now Tool Time. With that, Lillian introduces Cena and the crowd finally wakes the hell up for the first time tonight. Cena heads to the ring and it looks like this match will finally go down…or maybe not as we are joined by Big Show prior to the bell. Show slowly saunters down to the ring and climbs on the apron. Cena keeps his eyes on both men as the crowd cheers for him. He slugs Miz down and Show comes in from behind. Cena hoists him for the AA, but Show slips loose and drops him with a chokeslam. Show locks in his camel clutch and yanks up hard as Cena slowly fades. Miz now comes in and drills Show with a chair to the back. Show gets up and Miz works him over with some chair shots to the head. He unloads a chair shot on Cena’s back as well. Show gets up and Miz quickly bails. Show is not happy and tells Miz that his fate has been sealed. Cena is out cold as Miz slowly backs up the ramp and holds the chair high over his head. He stares towards the ring as we go to break.
– We are back from commercial and visiting with Cole and King, who recap this eventful night for us. We also get a video recap of the Legacy beatdown on Batista from the start of the show before heading back to the ring.
4) MVP vs. Matt Hardy
MVP heads out to the ring for our next contest. He has the mic and says he doesn’t know what is going on with the WWE Title, but he does know he should be in the mix for a title shot next week. He will win tonight to prove his point. And with that, he long time nemesis Matt Hardy makes his way out, arm still wrapped in the cast. Cole tells us that Raw will be three hours next week and will feature stars from all brands as well as three World Championship matches. MVP goes to work on the midsection to start. He takes him down with a drop toehold for one. Matt eats a boot on a charge but yanks MVP off the second rope and gets a near fall. Matt works MVP over in the ropes and then leaps onto MVP’s back. Matt locks in a front facelock but MVP works out of it. Matt drills him with a forearm to the back and tries for a surfboard submission. MVP slips out of it and tosses Matt up and over. MVP fires away at Matt and puts him down with a big right hand. He drills Matt with a facebuster and then drops the Ballin elbow to wake the crowd up. MVP gets a near fall but misses the Drive By. Matt takes him down with an inverted DDT for two. Matt mounts MVP in the corner, but MVP steps forward and hot shots Matt on the top rope. He attacks the cast and then nails the Playmaker for the win. MVP d. Hardy with the Playmaker; Grade: 2
– Vickie is walking backstage and her major announcement is up next.
– When we return, Cole and King talk about next week’s three hour Raw as well as CM Punk cashing in the MITB to take home the World Heavyweight Championship last night. Back to the ring as Lillian brings out Vickie Guerrero for her major announcement. She knows that a lot of fans are upset that she granted Randy Orton a rematch tonight. But, she is going to be a little bit honest. The last thing on her mind is making any of the fans happy. Vickie is in tears and she now talks about the hog pen match last night. She was covered in slop and mud and she has never, ever been so humiliated and insulted in her life. She looked to the fans for compassion last night, but all she could see was everyone laughing at her and taking pictures of her. She wants to know where our respect and decency are. She has had it and says that the Orton/Batista match is officially on. She is tired of being laughed at and being made fun of every week. So, she has come to a decision: she is resigning as GM of Raw. She says she quits and that elicits a huge pop. We are now joined by her husband, Edge, who limps down to the ring. Last night, he said some disrespectful things that he never should have said. He wanted to come out tonight to make things right and apologize. Vickie is happy to hear that. Edge says a funny thing happened…Vickie quit, so he doesn’t need to apologize or continue with the marriage. Vickie is confused. Edge says the sky is blue, the grass is green and he only married Vickie for her power. He wants to be Champion at any cost and since Vickie does not have that power, she is worthless. Vickie doesn’t believe what Edge is saying. Edge says that when they went out in public, people thought she was his mother. Edge says nobody could have really thought he would be in love with a she-beast. Vickie is crying, but Edge says he is the one that needs sympathy for pretending to be in love with her. Every time they kissed, he had to go to the bathroom to dry heave. The only saving grace is that they didn’t consecrate the marriage. The marriage is over and he wants a divorce. Vickie screams like a banshee as Edge walks from the ring. The crowd serenades Vickie with a farewell song as we go to break.
– We are back and checking out the Show/Miz/Cena segment from earlier. Backstage, Matthews asks Cena for an update on his condition. He has been worse but you find out who you are when your back is against the wall. He thought his 500 pounds of trouble was over with when he beat Show in his own match suggestion. He will settle things with Show. Now, on to Miz, a young man drafted to Raw claiming he is ready to reach for the brass ring. Miz is picking a fight with the baddest man in the bar and trying to make a name for himself. He kind of respects that, but every time Miz runs his mouth, he has someone else there to do his dirty work. He promises Miz that in the near future, they will come face to face to see how awesome Miz is. Back live, Legacy hits the ring for our next match. If they defeat the Champs here, they will earn a future tag title opportunity. As the Colons head to the ring, we take a break.
5) Cody Rhodes & Ted DiBiase vs. Carlito & Primo Colon in a non title match
When we return, Cody has Primo in a neck vise. Primo flips out of a back suplex attempt and nails Cody with an Enziguri. He tags in Carlito, who comes in with a springboard. He drills Cody with a running knee and follows with a dropkick for two. The two men trade shots but DiBiase distracts Carlito and Cody drops him with a DDT for two. Cody tags in Ted, who works over Carlito with some boots. He follows up with some million dollar fist drops for a near fall. DiBiase hooks in a reverse chinlock but Carlito fires free. Ted stops him and kicks him in the head. Ted tags in Cody and he keeps the assault on. He slams Carlito and drops a knee for two. Cody kicks him around and then tags in Ted. He takes Carlito down with a side Russian legsweep but Primo breaks up the cover. Ted taunts Carlito a bit before dropping some elbows for a near fall. Ted tags in Cody and they double team Carlito. He kicks Carlito around some more and tags Ted back in. Ted hammers away and then tags Cody back in. Cody goes back to the reverse chinlock as the crowd starts to wake again to rally Carlito. Carlito slips loose and finally tags in Primo as Cody tags Ted. Primo lands a clothesline and a dropkick before getting a near fall with a cross body. Cody distracts Primo and Ted rolls him up for two. Primo ducks a clothesline and drills Ted with a back elbow. Cody reaches up and snaps Primo across the top rope, allowing DiBiase to nail the Dream Street for the win. Well, that match was technically sound but the crowd was in a comatose state throughout. Rhodes & DiBiase d. The Colons when DiBiase pins Primo with Dream Street; Grade: 2
– Randy Orton is walking backstage, Batista’s belt slung on his shoulder, as we go to break.
– When we return, Orton is halfway down the ramp, Championship in tow. He climbs in the ring, where Rhodes & DiBiase are awaiting him. Orton grabs a mic and he gives some props to DiBiase and Rhodes for becoming the number one contenders for the Unified Tag Team Championships. Now, he hopes Batista doesn’t use the incident earlier as an excuse to not compete tonight. And we take yet another look back at the Batista beatdown from earlier. Back live, Orton wants to remind us of Vickie’s speech prior to her resignation. He is entitled to the rematch tonight and in the unlikely event that Batista does not show up or answer the ten count, he will be awarded the WWE Championship by forfeit. The bell sounds and Lillian officially introduces Orton and then Batista. The crowd calls for the Animal and his music hits but he does not appear. Orton looks around slowly as the music tapers off. He demands that Mike Chioda start to count. He calls for the bell and the count commences. As he gets to eight, we cut backstage to see the ambulance returning to the arena. Chioda stops the count, much to the consternation of DiBiase and Rhodes. The crowd continues to call for Batista as Orton readies himself. We cut backstage again to see Triple H emerge from the ambulance with his sledgehammer. DiBiase and Rhodes grab chairs as Triple H powerwalks to the ring. He comes onto the ramp and takes out DiBiase and Rhodes as they try to run interference. Hunter drops the sledge, takes off his shirt and climbs into the ring. Orton attacks him and the fight is on. Hunter turns the tables and hammers away at Orton in the corner. Orton bails but Hunter follows him out and keeps hammering away. He tosses Orton into the announcer’s corner and Orton pops him with a quick shot. He grabs a chair, but Hunter regains control and runs him into the announce table. Orton fends him off with a monitor and tries to escape, but Hunter catches up to him in the crowd. They trade blows until the end up at ringside. Hunter tosses Orton inside, where Randy grabs the chair. Hunter charges and takes Orton out with a spinebuster. Hunter grabs the chair and smashes Orton in the head with it to a huge pop. He wails on Orton with the chair, working over his back and neck. The crowd is screaming for a Pedigree and the Game obliges, spiking Orton on the chair with one. Hunter stands tall over Orton’s prone body as we fade out. Well, that was certainly a hot finish to what had been a sluggish, albeit eventful, show. See you all next week for the big three hour special!
Final Grade: C+
MVP: Randy Orton & Triple H
Runner Up: Miz
Non MVP: Batista
Runner Up: Vickie Guerrero
Posted on June 8, 2009, in Justin Rozzero, WWE and tagged Batista, Big Show, Brian Kendrick, Carlito, Chavo Guerrero, Cody Rhodes, Edge, Festus, Goldust, Jamie Noble, John Cena, Kelly Kelly, Kofi Kingston, Maryse, Matt Hardy, Mickie James, MVP, Primo Colon, Randy Orton, Santino Marella, Ted DiBiase Jr., The Legacy, The Miz, Triple H, Vickie Guerrero, William Regal. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.
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