ULTIMA LUCHA: Finale
August 5, 2015
Los Angeles, CA
The Temple

The current Lucha Underground champs are as follows:
Lucha Underground Champion: Prince Puma (1/7/15)
Lucha Underground Trios Champions: The Disciples of Death (7/29/15)
AAA Mega Champion: Alberto El Patron (12/7/14)

Great video package highlighting everything you need to know about the 38 weeks of Lucha Underground.

HIPSTER BAND OF THE WEEK: None

Your hosts are Matt Striker and Michael Schiavello (subbing for Vamp, brother).

• Alberto El Patron vs. Johnny Mundo
  

Alberto plays cat-and-mouse with Mundo to start. Once Mundo is caught, El Patron throws him into walls and the announce table. To get away, Mundo crawls underneath the ring and comes out with a clump of dirt to throw in Alberto’s face. Mundo returns the favor with all the ringside violence. Back inside, El Patron roundhouse kicks the End of the World attempt and gives Mundo a reverse superplex. After some punches are traded, El Patron nails a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker followed by a backcracker for two. The low superkick from Alberto misses. Mundo avoids a corner charge and drills El Patron with a lungblower of his own for two. He misses a 450 splash though and we go to the floor where Mundo blocks an incoming El Patron with a jumping knee. Mundo levels El Patron with a twisting plancha. Back in, Alberto avoids a corner charge and double stomps Mundo down in the corner. Time for the CROSS ARMBREAKER, but Mundo quickly rolls into the ropes. While in the tree of woe, Mundo sits up as Alberto runs straight into the ringpost. El Patron is still able to get up and try a back superplex, but Mundo knocks him down and double stomps him one good time. END OF THE WORLD! Cover, 1-2-NO! When Mundo yells at the ref, Alberto pops up to his feet and lands an armbreaker on the knees. He looks for that low superkick, but Mundo pulls the ref in the way. Oh here we go. Mundo’s Moonlight Drive is countered to the CROSS ARMBREAKER. Of course, Mundo taps. While Mundo is able to escape by standing up and stomping El Patron on the face, El Patron still manages to apply another CROSS ARMBREAKER over in the corner. With the ref still down, MELINA suddenly appears and cracks El Patron over the head with his own AAA mega championship. She rolls Alberto in the ring as Mundo lands the END OF THE WORLD for a second time. The ref suddenly wakes up and makes the three-count. (13:37) Is it safe to say Melina is the Missy Hyatt of the Millennials generation? She is elated that her former (perhaps?) bae Johnny Mundo has won the match as they share in a sweaty kiss in the ring. Alberto breaks it up though and dumps Mundo on the floor for a spirited ringside beatdown. Melina tries to stop El Patron to no avail. For a promotion that has at one time or another prided itself on promoting modern gender ideals, they take us back to the 1950s as Alberto grabs her and gives Melina a good spanking. Striker tells us that he will rewind that scene on his DVR an innumerable amount of times. While he may be the loser, Alberto El Patron walks out with his AAA title and his head held high. Not as strong of a match as their previous encounter on May 6 as they just seemed to be mirroring what the other was doing, but still very good to watch. Makes you wonder if we get a season two if there will be a rubber match. ***½

We pick up where we left off last week with El Dragon Azteca entering the Temple. When he reaches Black Lotus to take her with him, Dario Cueto is there to meet him. Cueto says Azteca has broken the treaty, which means now he must die. Since Black Lotus was told by Dario Cueto that it was actually El Dragon Azteca who killed her parents instead of Dario Cueto’s Elephant Man brother, Black Lotus grabs Azteca by the neck through the bars of her cell and jabs him in the middle of his spine to knock him out. Once that is done, Cueto tells Black Lotus that she has started a war now and they must leave before El Dragon Azteca wakes up. Cueto unlocks her cell and brings his brother with him as they flee the Temple. We still haven’t seen what the Elephant Man looks like though.

• Cero Miedo Match: Vampiro vs. Pentagon Jr.
  

Basically a fancy way of saying this is a hardcore rules match. Vampiro dons the white face paint again just like in the good old days. Coming to the ring, he looks like something straight out of an evil horror movie. The fight spills out into the crowd and back to ringside where Pentagon peels back the mats to give Vampiro an Attitude Adjustment on the concrete! He beats Vampiro senseless with a chair until the ref stops the match and we go to break. When we return, Vamp pulls a Mick Foley and gets off the gurney to return to the ring. Vampiro hits a spinning heel kick and pulls out some thumb tacks. Geez, he really is channeling Mick Foley here. He slams Pentagon on the thumb tacks, but misses a senton off the top and drops an F bomb. Uh oh, Pentagon finds a pack of light tubes and breaks them over Vamp’s head to make the man lose quite a bit of blood. Pentagon even cuts his head with one of the broken pieces. Vamp continues to bleed all over the place. Pentagon sets up another bunch of light tubes in the corner, but Vampiro doesn’t take the dive and sends Pentagon into the light tubes instead. He rips open the mask and breaks another bunch of light tubes over Pentagon’s head for retribution. Over in the corner, Vamp brings Pentagon down on top of the thumb tacks. Vampiro sets up a table in the ring and lights it on fire. Oh boy. Just as that happens, Pentagon lifts up Vamp and drops him through the table. As Vamp’s back catches on fire, he rolls out to the floor to try to put the fire out. Pentagon jumps on top and covers him for the win. (11:08 shown) As Pentagon begins to celebrate, Vamp tells him to break his arm to make the final sacrifice to the Master. Well, he does just that. Once that has been completed, Vamp announces to us that he is in fact the Master that Pentagon has been talking about for months. He tells Pentagon that he is now ready. WHAT. Even I didn’t see that coming for some reason. They embrace and do the 666 hand signal together. Too many light tubes for my taste. It doesn’t require much talent to take a light tube to the head. With that said, the finish did make sense considering the buildup when Pentagon threatened Vamp to set him on fire if Vamp didn’t accept his challenge. **

• Gift of the Gods Championship
  

One fall matchup here. So here we have the seven winners of the seven Aztec Medallions squaring for a title that will grant you a Lucha Underground title shot with a week’s notice and it will actually be defended. The combatants are: Aerostar, Bengala, Big Ryck, Fenix, King Cuerno, Jack Evans, and Sexy Star. Big Ryck clears the ring to start and tries to fly, but then the other six all run back in and attack the man. Ryck manages to clear the ring again except for Fenix and Aerostar. They dropkick the big man out so they can have time to themselves. Aerostar headscissors Fenix to the floor and flies with a somersault plancha. Aerostar dives off the apron, but gets caught in mid-air by Fenix for a powerslam on the floor. In the ring, Jack Evans kicks Cuerno to the floor for a Space Flying Tiger Drop, but Cuerno sidesteps and enziguri kicks Evans down. Big Ryck interrupts Sexy Star and Bengala doing some stuff. He cleans house again on all the smaller luchadores and heads out to beat up Bengala some more, but then Aerostar leaps from about 2½ stories up onto a pile of dudes. CRAZY. Once that moment dies down, Marty the Moth comes out to attack Sexy Star only to get caught in a tilt-a-whirl into an armbar. She dropkicks Marty the Moth to the floor and dives on top of another pile of dudes. Back in the ring, Big Ryck looks to finish off Sexy Star, but she avoids a corner charge and takes Ryck over with a flying headscissors. Cuerno jumps Sexy Star though and delivers the THRILL OF THE HUNT. Instead of pinning her and winning the GotG title, he rolls her out of the ring and goes after Fenix. Bengala interrupts their exchange with a springboard dropkick. He monkey flips Cuerno onto Fenix down in the corner. As Fenix heads to the floor, Bengala does a springboard dive onto him. Once Bengala stands back up, he’s met with a tope suicida by Cuerno. In the ring, Evans tries to get the quick win over Aerostar, but Aerostar counters a guillotine choke into a DDT on Evans. Springboard splash gets two. Sexy Star tries to get her own quick pinfall on Aerostar, but Big Ryck stops the count. Hey wait a minute, here comes DelAvar Daivari with a steel chair in hand. He whacks Big Ryck and leaves him down on the canvas. WHY DAIVARI? WHY? Cuerno goes for the win on Evans with the surfboard dragon sleeper until Fenix breaks it up with a springboard legdrop. Evans avoids the FIRE DRIVER as long as he can until eventually Fenix delivers the move for the win and the title. (12:13) They played to the strengths of everybody in this match, but I didn’t feel like there was much desire to WIN this match except in occasions where I didn’t think it would end at anyways. **½

• No-DQ Match: Texano vs. Blue Demon Jr. (w/the Crew)
  

Instead of looking like a couple of gangbangers, Cortez Castro & Cisco are pimped out in suits and blue ties. Cisco is even wearing a blue bandana! Due to his legendary status, Melissa Santos is handed a note that reads that Demon has got Dario Cueto to make this match changed with no-disqualification rules. Texano fights off Blue Demon and the Crew to start. He actually does quite well here and looks to finish off Blue Demon with the Batista Bomb, but the Crew come back in the ring and attack him again. Chavo Guerrero comes out wielding a chair seemingly here to make the save for Texano, but he whacks Texano with the very same chair he used to put Blue Demon on the shelf back on November 5. He then gives the chair over to Blue Demon to knock out Texano once again for the easy pinfall. (3:01) Another swerve on this show. Looks like we have a Blue Demon and Chavo Guerrero alliance happening now. Hmpfh. *

• Lucha Underground Champion Prince Puma vs. Mil Muertes (w/Catrina)
  

YES. I am excite. Of course Konnan would be here to support the champ if he hadn’t been carried off by the Disciples of Death in a casket a few weeks ago. Big ol’ brawl to start as they fight in and out and around the crowd. At one point, Muertes clears an entire section of fans and throws Puma into the empty chairs. Puma shows off his athleticism by doing a back flip off a guardrail and then springs off the apron to do a corkscrew roundhouse kick to Muertes. Out comes a table to be used later. Muertes attacks Puma again and turns the ringside steps on the side to powerbomb Puma. NASTY. Puma kicks a chair back in Mil’s face, but then takes a tope suicida only to eat the chair. Whether you like it or not, my mind went to Chris Benoit at the 2001 Royal Rumble with that spot. The chair gets wedged in the corner for something big. Muertes tries to fight off a cutter from Puma with a German suplex, but Puma flips out and lands on his feet to drill Muertes with a double stomp. Muertes catches Puma with one of his signature straight right jabs, but then SPEARS himself into the chair. BENADRYLLER to Muertes! Cover, 1-2-NO! Muertes avoids the Phoenix Splash and catches a couple shots to the jaw, but then grabs Puma for a snap powerslam for two. There’s a series of standing clotheslines in the corner on Puma until he falls to the mat. Puma fires back with a Pele Kick and hits Muertes with the Northern Lights and vertical suplex off the mat combo. Just amazing.

As Catrina lifts the Aztec stone in the air (just like Paul Bearer with the urn in the early days), Muertes powers up and SPEARS Puma through the ropes onto the table. When it doesn’t break, Muertes makes matters worse for Puma and drills him through the table with the powerbomb. Back in, that gets two. Muertes delivers a crazy Uranage. He calls for the SPEAR again, but Puma rolls out of the way and kicks Muertes down in position for the 630 SENTON. He connects! Cover, 1-2-NO! NOBODY HAS KICKED OUT OF THAT, I THINK. He goes up for a second one, but Muertes rolls out of the way. SPEAR to Puma! FLATLINER. Cover, 1-2-NO! Definitely no one has kicked out of the Flatliner. Puma delivers another series of kicks and heads up top, but Muertes is there to meet him. Puma knocks him back down, but Muertes pops up and catches Puma with a SUPER FLATLINER. Muertes covers Puma for the win and secures the LU title. (17:40) Afterwards, Catrina gives Puma the lick of death and then her Disciples of Death come out to celebrate with the new champ as they hold up their trios title as well. HUGE night for Catrina and her boys. You know what I just realized? The DOD’s mask has the same design as The Mask from the Jim Carrey movie. As Lucha Underground is known to do, they pull out all the stops and make these Mil Muertes main events as fun as they possibly can. Holy crap. ****

Over in Dario Cueto’s office, he and Black Lotus get some cash together and bail out of the Temple in his SUV. Of course, he’s got his Elephant Man brother in a horse trailer. We get a three second shot of what Dario’s brother looks like. It ain’t pretty and looks VERY CG. What if they headed to Amish country in Pennsylvania? It could be like Witness meets For Richer or Poorer.

Yeah, something like that.

Elsewhere, Fenix leaves the Temple in his Pontiac Firebird (naturally). Marty the Moth has lost his mind and kidnapped Sexy Star. He can’t wait to show her his sister. The former trios champs leave on some motorcycles. Son of Havoc has to ride shotgun with Ivelisse though. Drago and Aerostar shake hands to settle their grievances. Drago leaves in a fiery blaze while Aerostar shoots off into the sky like a rocket ship. Pentagon and Vampiro are chatting it up in the Dungeon of Doom, I believe. The Man in the Gray Hoodie spray paints a question mark on the Lucha Underground billboard outside the Temple. Rey Mysterio? He is in AAA now. The montage ends with Dario Cueto turning the lights off in the Temple as he seemingly floats across the floor. I know that is from a movie, but I can’t for the life of me remember what movie that is from.

Anywho, that’s a wrap on Lucha Underground. They are 99.7% sure that there will be a season two. Hopefully that news will change to 100% because this is the only current product that is keeping me super interested. WWE really does nothing for me anymore, I haven’t really cared for Impact Wrestling since 2012, ROH and New Japan are in the same boat to me. Just really stale shows. If I’m going to watch wrestling nowadays, I’ll stick with Lucha Underground if it comes back or finish my RAW and Nitro projects.

Final Thoughts: Really fun show overall capped off by a great main event. Tons of endings that will lead to new beginnings for sure. A season finale is what I have thought professional wrestling has needed for years now. If they want to be seen and taken seriously as a TV show and not a circus that tours year-round, they need to have a finale and a legitimate premiere with some time for people to MISS the product. Wrestlers could take several months off to rest their bodies, they could do tons of company-approved promotion for the company they work for, it would give writers a chance to rest and come up with better ideas. Anyways, no matter how you slice it, Lucha Underground feels modern and they are doing wrestling the way it should be done in 2015. Excellent well fleshed-out characters, insane athleticism, and staying consistent with the stories they are trying to portray week after week. Bottom line, thumbs up for Ultima Lucha. Check it out on any one of the various ways you watch wrestling.