February 11, 2008
Austin, TX
Frank Irwin Center

The current RAW champions are as follows:
WWE Champion: Randy Orton (10/7/2007)
WWE Intercontinental Champion: Jeff Hardy (9/3/2007)
World Tag Team Champions: Hardcore Holly & Cody Rhodes (12/10/2007)
WWE Women’s Champion: Beth Phoenix (10/7/2007)

Read along if you have the WWE Network!

Your hosts are Jim Ross & Jerry Lawler.

  • No-DQ Match: Vince McMahon vs. Hornswoggle

Since Vince’s bastard son Hornswoggle wouldn’t join the “Kiss My Ass” club last week for leaving the Royal Rumble early and instead bit his father on the ass, he decides to punish Horny’s fans by forcing him into a NO DISQUALIFICATION MATCH, and if Finlay interferes he will be FIRED.  They actually lock up and it’s hilarious. Vince pushes him back a few times and shows off his biceps. He gets down on one knee and allows a free shot. Horny acts like he won’t do it, but then he bitch slaps him one good time. Vince stands up and takes his belt off ready to whoop his son. Finlay actually runs down and chases Vince away. Oh boy. Vince berates Finlay for sticking his nose in family business. He tries to get Finlay to think about his own family because he meant what he said last week. There’s no reason to risk it all for Hornswoggle. Friendship? Loyalty? That’s BS. Vince continues to try and drive a wedge between Horny and Finlay and even calls Finlay a coward. OH SNAP. After Vince pushes Hornswoggle aside, Finlay wallops Vince with the shillelagh. YES. The match isn’t over, so Finlay drags Vince over to the corner and lets Horny deliver the TADPOLE SPLASH for the win. (5:38) But you better believe there will be HELL TO PAY. N/R

Backstage, an angry and eager RAW GM William Regal finds Vince getting some ice on his head and asks him what he can do for him. He tells Regal to get some dismissal papers because he’s going to FIRE Finlay.

  • Chris Jericho vs. JBL

Several stiff tie-ups to start. They quickly head to the floor for some brawling with Jericho in charge. Back inside, Jericho rips and bites on JBL’s face. He shoots on JBL for the Walls of Jericho, but JBL reaches the ropes. JBL takes a baseball slide that sends him to the floor and lands bad on a shoulder. Back in, Jericho is still running the match until he tries the springboard dropkick to the apron and gets booted down. Commercials! When we return, JBL drills Jericho with some short-arm clotheslines. He stomps on Jericho’s face and grabs a sleeperhold. Ross mentions that JBL has hired Umaga for protection leading into No Way Out. JBL sits Jericho on the top buckle and punches him before trying a superplex. Jericho headbutts him down and gives JBL a flying forearm smash to the back of the head for two. Jericho mounts a comeback and delivers a step-up enziguri to set up a missile dropkick for another nearfall. He flies into a Fallaway Slam, but Jericho counters to a DDT for two. JBL stops a corner charge from Jericho with a big boot, but Jericho ducks the Clothesline from Hell and catches JBL with the CODEBREAKER for the win. (10:20 shown) Afterwards, Umaga comes out and destroys both guys – because the Elimination Chamber is EVERY MAN FOR HIMSELF. **½

Mike Adamle stands in the crowd to set up an awesome promo video for Orton-Cena III at No Way Out.

Backstage, William Regal goes to Mr. McMahon’s office with dismissal papers in hand. McMahon comes out and Regal tells Vince all the things he should be doing to Finlay for what he has done. Instead of firing Finlay, Vince makes a steel cage match for he and Hornswoggle – NEXT WEEK.

  • Paul Burchill (w/Katie Lea) vs. Brian Kendrick

Burchill makes his return to WWE and he’s now got his sister with him Katie Lea. They really seem into each other. Pretty solid glorified squash as Burchill wins with a NASTY Curb Stomp and a ROLLING CUTTER gets the win. (2:55) This incest stuff seems more like an ECW on Sci-Fi gimmick if you ask me.

Let Us Take You Back (brought to you by Devil May Cry 4), RAW 2/4/08. John Cena almost beat Mark Henry in an arm wrestling contest when Randy Orton. After Randy went running away, Cena gave Henry an FU. Seems like they are trying awful hard to show you how good Cena’s torn pec really is.

  • John Cena vs. Mark Henry

Randy Orton comes out to join us for special guest commentary. In the first thirty seconds, Henry finds the WORLD’S STRONGEST SLAM. That stuns Cena pretty good. Henry starts choking and whipping Cena from corner to corner before exposing a turnbuckle. It’s Full Nelson time, but Henry decides pounding Cena is more fun. Henry misses an avalanche and runs into the exposed turnbuckle. As Henry gets staggered, Cena takes him down with a flying shoulderblock and locks in the STFU for the tapout. (2:51) Orton can’t believe what he just saw. Cena walks down to the floor and grabs a mic to tell Orton that he’s 100%, stronger than ever, and more focused than ever – because now he’s the hunter instead of being the hunted. He says this Sunday there are no injuries, no excuses, and NO WAY OUT. Orton calls him a coward for speaking his peace and then walking away. Awesome. ¾*

Red Hot Chili Peppers, “Snow (Hey Oh)” tells us that WrestleMania is 48 days away.

Mr. Kennedy comes out to see if Ric Flair accepts his challenge for No Way Out. Here comes Ric Flair to a huge ovation from the Austin crowd. He tells Kennedy how it is brother. Flair came up in the era where you worked seven days a week and twice on Sunday so that punks like Kennedy can work 100 days a year and make a ton of money. If Kennedy thinks he won’t show up at the PPV because he’s hurt, he’s got another thing coming. Flair says he’s been the world champion sixteen times and Kennedy has yet to even win it once. He thinks Kennedy has a bright future ahead, but it won’t be at the expense of the NATURE BOY. Okay, Flair is getting warmed up. At No Way Out, the NATURE BOY will walk that aisle as only he has looked for 35 years. He will get in this ring and will live to fight another day. WOO! YES. The mic gets dropped and Kennedy looks like he’s going to walk away when he decides to dropkick the injured knee. I enjoyed it.

  • Maria (w/Santino Marella) vs. Melina (w/Jillian Hall)

Santino joins us for special guest commentary concerning Maria’s decision to be in Playboy. Maria shows off her long legs to start. Melina drives her knees into Maria over in the corner and then locks in an Octopus hold. Maria tries coming back with clotheslines, but they are really bad. She delivers a gutbuster, but Maria doesn’t really sell. She comes back with a running bulldog. When it looks like Melina is done, Jillian Hall starts singing and smooches Santino to distract Maria. That allows Melina to scoop her up for the three-count. (2:44) Santino gets in the ring and tells Maria she lost because of the Playboy curse. He provides examples and then wants her to choose Playboy or him. ULTIMATUMS~! Women love those. He gives her one week to decide and says unlike the losers in the crowd, he’s the one who really loves her. He gives her a big smooch (with tongue!) and walks out. ½*

We go behind the scenes with John Cena doing an ad for NASCAR which will debut during the Daytona 500.

Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler run down the No Way Out card.

Candice Michelle returns – NEXT WEEK ON RAW.

  • Shawn Michaels vs. Jeff Hardy

After they bump fists, HBK chops him in the chest and goes for the pin! Classy. Jeff gets a quick nearfall off a backslide as well. To the floor we go! Hardy lands on his feet when he misses a pescado, but then turns around and takes a slap to the face. Jeff retaliates with one of his own. Back in, Hardy slows things down a bit with a headlock. As Shawn fights out, he takes the Ray Stevens bump in the corner. Jeff follows him in and nails him from behind. He takes a shot at the Back Superplex, but Michaels falls on top for two. Back to the headlock. Shawn escapes and tries to toss Jeff to the floor, but he skins-the-cat back in only to be met with a nice clothesline. I think this is where his lip starts to bleed. That ought to teach you to not wear a lip ring during a match, but this is Jeff Hardy we’re talking about here. Hardy comes back with an inverted atomic drop using both knees and kicks Shawn out to the floor. Jeff follows him out and walks across the barricade only to jump into a powerslam! Commercials! When we return, the strategy is obvious: Shawn works the back. After a couple hard whips into the corner, Shawn locks in a bow-and-arrow for a bit. Backbreaker gets two. Michaels comes off the second rope and Jeff brings the boot up to block, but Shawn sees it coming and applies a brutal half crab. He struggles for a while, but ultimately makes the ropes. Hardy avoids the Flying Elbow and covers HBK for 1-2-NO! He hits the dropkick down in the corner and gets a nearfall. Whisper in the Wind gets 1-2-NO! Shawn spins the Twist of Fate around into a jawbreaker and connects with the Flying Forearm. The kip-up hurts his back though. He delivers the Flying Elbow and “tunes up the band”. Sweet Chin Music fails, but so does the Twist of Fate! Michaels trips up Hardy and applies that Inverted Figure-Four he was trying to get over back then. There hasn’t been a lot of work on the leg in this one, so Hardy makes the ropes. Jeff blocks another shot at Sweet Chin Music and lands the Twist of Fate! With Shawn in position, he delivers the SWANTON BOMB and covers for the 1-2-3! (16:58 shown) Big win for Jeff. They had started to get serious with him after he scored a fluke pin on Triple H back at Armageddon, but his push would get put on hold due to a Wellness Policy Violation that will cause him to miss WrestleMania 24. ***¾

NO WAY OUT IS NEXT. Until then, so long for now.


Posted on August 6, 2018, in WWE and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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