WWE: Smackdown
March 28, 2008
Fayetteville, NC
Crown Coliseum

The current Smackdown champions are as follows:
World Heavyweight Champion: Edge (12/16/2007)
WWE United States Champion: MVP (5/20/2007)
WWE Tag Team Champions: The Miz & John Morrison (11/16/2007)

Read along if you have the WWE Network!

Your hosts are Michael Cole & Jonathan Coachman.

• Battle Royal: Mark Henry, Chuck Palumbo, Kane, The Great Khali

We’ve got a match of the “favorites” for the 24 man battle royal to see who will face Chavo Guerrero for the ECW title. Speaking of Chavo, he’s sitting at ringside talking about how he’s going to win because he’s a Guerrero. Palumbo is the first to go as he’s outsmarted by Kane. No surprise there. Cole explains the rules of a battle royal like everyone is five years old. Kane comes back on Henry and Khali, but then gets run down by Henry. Tree Slam to Kane. Henry picks up Kane like he’s a cruiserweight and tosses him out. Khali delivers a BRAIN CHOP to Henry, but he doesn’t really sell it for obvious reasons. Henry then picks up Khali and drops him over the top rope for the win. (2:46) After the bell, Chavo jumps Henry from behind and breaks Henry down at the knee. Once Henry goes to a knee, Chavo comes off the middle rope only to get caught in a WORLD’S STRONGEST SLAM. This crowd has no idea how to respond to that. The black guys in the front row are clapping though, so kudos to Henry. This was not good. N/R

We don’t want to miss the metaphorical burial of Undertaker’s WrestleMania Undefeated Streak by Edge – TONIGHT.

WRESTLEMANIA 24 – 2 DAYS AWAY!

Elsewhere, Teddy Long approaches Cherry, Eve Torres, and Michelle McCool to discuss the latest results of the “Most Popular Smackdown Diva Contest” where the winner gets a motorcycle from Beverly Hills Choppers. What, is Eric Bischoff booking this show now? A drumroll plays and Teddy acts like he has no idea where it’s coming from. Just as Eve gets eliminated from the contest, Maryse and Victoria IMMEDIATELY appear and start ragging on her. So Teddy makes them all go ONE ON ONE WITH DA UNDERTAKER. Nah, he books a water fight for later tonight.

• John Morrison vs. CM Punk

Another MITB match faceoff. This one should be pretty good. Headlocks and hammerlocks are traded to start. Morrison shows off his kicks, but then so does Punk. They take a crazy bump to the floor as we go to commercial. When we come back, Morrison escapes a headscissors and trips up Punk on the apron. Back in, Morrison runs Punk’s shoulder into the post. Now Morrison starts ripping at the shoulder with an overhead wristlock. WILL PUNK GIVE IT UP? Nope. Punk ducks the Flying Chuck and starts kicking. There’s a BIG BACK BODY DROP. Punk follows up with a monkey flip and clotheslines Morrison to the floor for a tope suicida. Back in the ring, Morrison avoids the Springboard Clothesline, but runs into a powerslam for a nearfall. WELCOME TO CHICAGO, 1-2-NO! Morrison finds the backbreaker and neckbreaker combo for two. Punk catches a kick and goes for the GTS, but Morrison sunset flips him over. Punk rolls through *that* and catapults Morrison into the corner. The high knee and running bulldog connects for two. They fight all the way to the top rope where Punk gives Morrison a SUPER HURRACANRANA. Cover, 1-2-NO! Finisher attempts are traded, but Punk connects with the GTS for the win. (9:40 shown) Fun back and forth match. **½

More Floyd Mayweather and Big Show hype.

Now we get to see footage from the WrestleMania 24 press conference in NYC.

• Kofi Kingston, Jesse & Festus vs. The Miz, Lance Cade & Trevor Murdoch

Six more guys who will see in the upcoming 24 man battle royal. Kofi is still considered from Jamaica at this point. Wonder when that switched to Ghana? Festus goes NUTZ on the heels to start. Of course, Cole thinks it’s funny because he has the sense of humor of a five year old. Jesse gets tagged in for a swinging neckbreaker on Murdoch. Kofi tags in and jumps around. Back to Jesse, Miz shoves him off the top rope to the floor to become *your* face in peril for a bit. Hot tag to Kofi, he runs wild on Miz. He does a crazy sunset flip over Miz for two. This dude’s vertical leap, man. The Boom Drop connects, but Cade and Murdoch jump him. Festus clears the ring of the Rednecks while Kofi lands TROUBLE IN PARADISE on Miz for the win. (6:18) Cole calls Kofi’s roundhouse kick the “Jamaican Buzzsaw”, but whatever. **

They re-air the announcement that Gordon Solie will be posthumously joining the WWE Hall of Fame Class of 2008.

• Batista vs. ???

The RAW GM William Regal has sent over a SUPER SECRET OPPONENT for Bats to get him hurting for WrestleMania, I suppose. It’s SNITSKY. This is over in no time with a Spear, a Spinebuster, and the DEMON BOMB. (:23) Afterwards, Batista brings a chair in the ring and gives Snitsky a DEMON BOMB on the chair. Does Umaga even watch TV? N/R

They air a nice promo for the Undertaker and Edge at WM24.

• WrestleMania Wet N Wild Water Fight: Michelle McCool & Cherry vs. Victoria & Maryse

Eve is the guest referee for this all important contest. Victoria comes out wearing a snorkel, floaties, and flippers. There’s water balloons and super soakers in the ring. Of course, they all throw like girls so the water balloons either completely miss or there’s not enough force behind them to bust. Maryse is over this and decides to do her hair flip thing, so she gets a bucket of water dumped on her. Wet Maryse = RATINGS. Victoria beats Michelle with a water gun, but heel miscommunication gets Maryse even wetter as she falls through the ropes to the floor. Meanwhile, McCool delivers the WINGS OF LOVE to Victoria for the three-count. (3:07) With the way they were slipping around in there, that move might not have been the best idea. N/R

Cole and Coach run down the WrestleMania 24 card.

• Chris Jericho vs. MVP

No titles on the line here, just two more MITB winning favorites facing off. Cole reminds us this is Jericho’s first match on Smackdown since 2002. Some mat work early turns ugly as MVP just open hand slaps Jericho, but YOU DON’T SLAP A MAN. They start trading punches. Jericho catches MVP with a back elbow. MVP takes a powder, but turns around into a dropkick through the ropes. On the apron, Jericho tries the springboard dropkick, but MVP blocks with a big boot. Jericho misses a corner charge and does the Slaughter bump out to the floor. Commercials! When we return, MVP has Jericho stretched out in the ring. Jericho fights out, but MVP hits the BALLIN’ Elbow. The Helluva Kick misses and Jericho lands a flying forearm smash to the back of the head for two. Here comes Jericho. He runs wild on MVP, but gets thrown away with a quick overhead suplex. Jericho finds a Northern Lights suplex and stuns MVP with an enziguri and a running face slam. MVP blocks the Lionsault though and lands the Drive-By Kick for two. Jericho surprises MVP with the Walls of Jericho, but MVP kicks him away and hits the Helluva Kick for 1-2-NO! Playmaker fails, but Jericho grabs the WALLS OF JERICHO. MVP quickly finds the ropes, snaps Jericho’s neck on the top rope, grabs his US title, tosses the IC title in the ring. As MVP goes to strike Jericho with his belt, the ref calls for the bell (?) to DQ MVP and Jericho catches him with the CODEBREAKER with the US title in between them. (10:23 shown) Afterwards, Jericho brings in a ladder from under the ring and runs it into MVP’s face. With more of a story behind them, I could see them having a good match together. This was fine, but nothing extraordinary. **½

The Burial of the Undertaker’s WrestleMania Undefeated Streak: Edge and his Edge Heads come out to the ring. There’s a funeral arrangement set up in the ring with Teddy Long there to introduce the Smackdown GM Vickie Guerrero who is dressed in all black sitting in her wheelchair. The World Champ Edge is prepared to give the eulogy. The crowd chants “YOU SUCK”, which I hope is the first time this has been done at a funeral. As Edge starts listing off the people Undertaker has defeated at WrestleMania, there’s no Giant Gonzales mentioned. THERE’S NO GIANT GONZALES MENTIONED! Speaking of people who will be forgotten, Edge thinks when he beats the Undertaker that the man will be forgotten and Edge will live on forever. Vickie gets on the mic and talks about her boo. She thinks Edge is what men should aspire to be. It gets weird. She sets up a movie trailer they had made that makes Edge look like the hero and UT the villain. Edge is so overwhelmed with the awesome video that he hugs both Ryder and Hawkins. He then declares Vickie as the love of his life. As Edge and Vickie gross everyone out with their PDA, we hear the Undertaker’s BONG. The lights go blue and Hawkins and Ryder head to the aisle ready to take on the Undertaker. Of course, Taker is in the casket in the ring – because why wouldn’t he be. He beats up Edge, takes out Ryder and Hawkins, and then CHOKESLAMS Edge into the casket. With everyone down, Taker scares Vickie away who gets up out of her chair and sprints to the locker room. TOMBSTONES to Ryder and Hawkins! Edge barely escapes to the floor as Taker lets Edge know the end is near. I think we all knew where this was going, but it still manages to be entertaining – and isn’t that all that matters?

NEXT UP: WrestleMania 24!