WCW Monday Nitro
February 3, 1997
Memphis, TN
Mid-South Coliseum

The current WCW champs were as follows:
WCW World Champion: Hollywood Hogan (8/10/1996)
WCW U.S. Champion: Eddie Guerrero (12/29/1996)
WCW World Tag Team Champions: The Outsiders (10/27/1996)
WCW World Television Champion: Lord Steven Regal (8/20/1996)
WCW Cruiserweight Champion: Dean Malenko (1/21/1997)
WCW Women’s Champion: Akira Hokuto (12/29/1996)

HOUR NUMBER ONE! Your hosts are Tony Schiavone and Larry Zbyszko.

Hollywood Hogan, Ted DiBiase, and Vincent head out to kick off the program. Tonight will be one of the most important nights in the history of our sport because “Rowdy” Roddy Piper will be stopping by to answer the challenge to meet Hollywood Hogan at Superbrawl for the WCW world title. When Piper gets to the building, Hogan says he’ll go ahead and give him a title shot – TONIGHT!

• Ultimo Dragon (w/Sonny Oono) vs. Ray Mendoza Jr.
  

First Miguel Perez back in November, now Ray Mendoza. It’s like WWE, but with Latin nepotism! I keed. By the way, Daddy Mendoza’s kids are the famous Villanos. I believe this one is Villano V, yet for some reason he’s wearing a IV on his tights. Anywho, great action to begin as they trade off the wristlocks and hammerlocks while Tony and Larry Z talk about Roddy Piper. Have I mentioned what Piper’s strange incoherent babbling meant at the last Nitro of 1996? I can’t remember because it’s been so long since I’ve worked on WCW 1997. Anyways, Tony says the strange dialect translates to “the battle is not over until he goes home”. Handspring elbow sends Mendoza to the floor. Mendoza thinks he’s ducked a dive, but GUESS AGAIN. Dragon fakes him out and knocks Mendoza straight into the guardrail with the suicide dive. Back in, I think Mendoza was knocked silly by that guardrail as Dragon takes it easy on him until Mendoza figures out where he is. Mendoza flips out of an armbar and then armdrags Dragon away to set him up for a clothesline. Dragon tries to roll past a leapfrog, but Mendoza doesn’t have much a vertical leap and comes down on him. Quick headscissors in the ring sets up the DRAGONSTEINER from the top turnbuckle. Just for the sake of continuity of chasing Dean Malenko and the Cruiserweight belt, Dragon puts Mendoza away with the Tiger Suplex. (3:13) Good action as it wasn’t just a total squash. **

• Glacier vs. Billy Kidman
  

They still haven’t given this guy something to do except remain undefeated. Don’t worry though, it’s coming. I think. Glacier tries some basic hook-up stuff to start, but NO-SELLS a dropkick and legsweeps Kidman. Glacier delivers a cool tilt-a-whirl pancake slam and reverts to his MARTIAL ARTS SKILLZ. Rolling back elbow sends Kidman to the floor, but he pops back in with a slingshot headscissors. He heads up top, but flies down into the CRYONIC KICK for the win. (2:08) Memphis booed the guy, but they loved the finish. ¾*

Ted DiBiase and Syxx tell us to buy the nWo denim jacket for only 80 bucks plus an extra ten for S&H. Gah, what kind of a tool would wear an nWo denim jacket. Not this tool. I know that much.

WCW Saturday Night! Watch it IF YOU WEEL! 6:05PM eastern time! TBS! This week, Jeff Jarrett goes one on one with Hugh Morrus! For the US strap, Eddie Guerrero defends against Dean Malenko! Awesome! Don’t miss out! It’s the MUTHASHIP! PAY WINDAHS, CLUBBERIN, AND PLUNDAH, BABY!

• Ice Train (w/Teddy Long) vs. La Parka
  

They think La Parka is too big to be a luchadore which besides his attire is what makes him stand out, so instead they put him with somebody BIGGER than he is to make him completely useless. Nevertheless, Ice Train is all about “raising the roof”. Most of this is Ice Train pounding La Parka, but he fights back with spinning heel kicks and takes Ice Train to the floor for a corkscrew plancha of sorts. Back inside, La Parka flies into a front powerslam. Awesome. The match looks like it should have ended there with Train’s running splash or something. Instead, they continue in the ring as we go backstage to see the Outsiders with lead pipes in their hands standing over a downed Lex Luger. But Lex is supposed to wrestle Jeff Jarrett tonight! Alright, back to the match. Ice Train delivers the JUMPING FROG SPLASH for the three-count. (5:15) Well, this was better than it could have been. *

Instead of following up on the condition of Lex Luger, we go to Gene Okerlund who brings out the Four Horsemen not including Arn Anderson and the ladies. Chris Benoit says after the Clash, he knows exactly who his friends are. Woman tells Jackie that she’s got her leftovers. *SNAP SNAP SNAP* Mongo gets on the mic and Memphis begins to boo. Anytime Benoit and Flair needs Mongo, just let him know. He announces that if it’s okay with the powers that be, he wants to take Lex Luger’s place tonight so he can get his hands on Jeff Jarrett tonight. Debra talks about how perfect she is and makes an ugly joke directed at Miss Jackie. Dang, she COLD. What do you think is causin’ all this, Ric? With AA gone, Ric says he’s here to call out Kevin Sullivan. Flair says he couldn’t handle Woman (which is why his arm is busted up), so he let the better man Chris Benoit take over. Hmm, that’s probably a regrettable decision in hindsight. He also informs Jackie that nobody with a boyfriend named “Shorty” can walk next to the NATCHA BOY! WOO! Even when it’s pointless, I love me some Flair.

Replay is shown of last week where the Steiners had to give up the tag belts they won illegitimately at Souled Out.

• Harlem Heat (w/Sister Sherri) vs. Rick & Scott Steiner
  

Harlem Heat disrupted the FOF/Steiners match last week to get this match going. This week, we’ve got the Faces of Fear and Public Enemy (in separate sections) are just chilling in the front row. Booker and Scott start us off. Booker claws his way out of an overhead wristlock and nails Scott with a spin kick, but pays for it with a press slam. Stevie Ray storms inside, but Scott ducks a clothesline which sends Stevie Ray right into a Steinerline from Rick! After Harlem Heat regroups, Rick gets a tag. Unfortunately, Stevie Ray punches his head gear off! Rick comes back with a powerslam for two. Tag to Scott, he locks in what would become known as the Steiner Recliner a year later. Meanwhile, Rick gets his head gear back on and tags back in only to get drilled with an atomic drop. Tag to Booker, he catches Rick with a Jumping Leg Lariat, but again the Harlem Heat control is short lived as Rick drills Booker with a powerslam. HOT TAG TO SCOTT! He cleans house on Stevie Ray and hits the Butterfly Slam for two. With everybody in the ring, the Faces of Fear and Public Enemy jump inside as well for the big no-contest finish. (5:02) What ends up happening is Harlem Heat and the Steiners beat Public Enemy and the Faces of Fear out of the ring, who go brawling all the way backstage. Alright. *½

HOUR NUMBER TWO! Your hosts are Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan, and Mike Tenay. As always, Heenan is the voice of reason and logic. Why isn’t WCW arming themselves with lead pipes? The nWo are.

• WCW Cruiserweight Champion Dean Malenko vs. Mike Enos
  

How is Mike Enos in the cruiserweight division? Enos gets serious with a headlock to start. Enough of that, Malenko begins ripping the arm apart. This all continues until we see Syxx walking through the crowd and over the rail. Since he couldn’t keep the US title, now he’s stealing the Cruiserweight belt and Dean Malenko has NO idea. As Syxx returns back through the crowd, Enos manages to avoid the TEXAS CLOVERLEAF. However, Malenko outsmarts Enos by countering a suplex into a small package for the 1-2-3. (7:09) Kind of long for what it was, but it sets up the Malenko-Syxx angle for Superbrawl. *

It’s time to check in with Lee Marshall who is On the Road with 1-800-COLLECT. He’s in Jacksonville Florida getting everyone ready for next week’s Monday Nitro. Lee makes a bad weasel joke and Tenay delivers his best high-pitched giggle. Of course, you don’t want to joke on Bobby Heenan because he is ALWAYS better than you.

Over by the entrance way, Gene Okerlund is standing alongside Kevin Sullivan, Konnan, Miss Jackie, and Jimmy Hart. Sullivan calls Jackie the “light” in his darkness. With that being said, Jimmy responds with his own opinion that women have no place in professional wrestling. Konnan, in his own way, tells Kevin and Jimmy to forget about these issues and start concentrating on the Four Horsemen. Tonight, Konnan wants Chris Benoit. As for Jackie, she calls Debra a plastic bimbo while she says she is all natural. And Woman, you just jealous over losing Kevin Sullivan to her, grrrl. If she sticks her nose in Jackie’s business, she will BEAT her like she stole something. What’s the leather strap for, Jackie? Don’t worry about it, Gene.

• Diamond Dallas Page vs. Renegade
  

Tony actually mentions how Renegade lost the TV title at Fall Brawl 1995 to DDP. Since then, you can say Renegade’s career has taken a giant slant towards zero through no real fault of his own. Renegade manages the Handspring Corner Elbow, but DDP crotches him up top and delivers the SUPER DIAMOND CUTTER! (2:04) He can hit it from anywhere. ½*

More importantly, the Outsiders with lead pipes still in hand are shown standing at the entrance ramp daring DDP to come by them. Since he won’t come to them, the Outsiders start walking towards DDP. BUT WAIT! Sting and Randy Savage are watching on from the stands. We have a stand off as DDP arms himself with a chair. Nothing happens though as the Outsiders see Sting and Savage and decide to leave Page alone. DDP looks completely baffled in the ring as we go to break.

• Alex Wright vs. Super Calo
  

Calo is all quick to start, but whiffs on a dropkick. He tries to come back by flipping out of the corner, but he slips and falls. After Wright works a headlock, Calo stops that with a back suplex and starts where he wanted to be earlier with springing off the ropes onto Wright. To the floor, Calo wipes out Alex with a huge dive. Back in, Wright baits him as he comes off the top into a dropkick. Wright starts up the headscissors takedowns and takes Calo to the floor for a plancha. Back inside, Calo catches Wright up top with a pop-up superplex for two. Calo hits a somersault headscissors with Wright perched up top, but completely misses a somersault splash. Missile dropkick by Wright scores the pinfall. (6:08) This just felt strange to me, but still one of the better matches of the night. *½

• Chris Benoit (w/Woman) vs. Konnan (w/Jimmy Hart)
  

Something tells me we will find out here what Jackie’s leather strap is all about. Konnan jumps Benoit at the bell and hits the Rolling Lariat. Konnan stretches the crap out of Benoit, but then he reverses a whip and Benoit is all over Konnan with chops and a superplex. AWESOME. Konnan ducks a clothesline and delivers SPLASH MOUNTAIN for 1-2-NO! He tries another, but Benoit slips away and drills Konnan with a Release German Suplex. Benoit threatens Konnan with the DRAGON SUPLEX as Jacqueline heads down to ringside to well, threaten Woman with her leather strap. Meanwhile, Benoit heaves Konnan over the top rope to lose via DQ as Jimmy Hart heads up on the apron only to get knocked down. (4:15) Benoit heads out and takes the strap away from Jackie, who then begins to look under the ring for a weapon of some kind. This chick is CRAZY. Finally, Konnan and Jimmy Hart restrain Jackie and take her with them backstage. **

• Jeff Jarrett vs. Steve McMichael (w/Debra)
  

More Horsemen BS. It’s no surprise that Debra is not happy about this match, which is the whole reason Mongo took this match. Like a pro, McMichael interrupts the Fargo strut and chokes Jarrett on the top rope. Of course, the Memphis crowd is not happy about that. He destroys JJ, but misses an elbow drop and here comes Jarrett! Flying bodypress gets two. Jarrett dropkicks Mongo over the top rope to the floor. He wants back in, but Debra keeps pulling her hubby back until he LOSES BY COUNTOUT. (2:19) This marks the first time in the HISTORY of our sport where a wrestler has lost by countout because a woman held him back, says Tony. By the way, Debra seems pretty proud of herself. CRAP

Roddy Piper returns for the first time since December 30. He’s got his little boy with him now though. Surely the nWo won’t bother him with his son Colt in the ring. Piper gets the cheap pop by saying he’ll never be Elvis Presley, while Hulk Hogan will never be Roddy Piper. In response to getting the title shot, he’s already beat Hogan. Why does he even need to wrestle Hogan in another match? He’s got nothing to prove by beating Hogan again, so he turns down the title shot. Well, cue the nWo music. Here comes Hollywood Hogan, Eric Bischoff, Ted DiBiase, and Vincent. Hogan and Bischoff start crowding around Piper and his son, which freaks him out quite a bit. By Hogan merely mentioning Piper claiming to be the ICON of wrestling, Bischoff busts a gut laughing over that one. Just so that nothing bad will happen, Hogan and Bischoff scare Piper into telling everyone that Hollywood Hogan beat him like a drum at Starrcade. Hogan even gets Piper to admit that he is the ICON of wrestling as well. He continues on to say that the only way Piper would talk eye-to-eye with Hogan is by hiding behind his little son. OH MAN. As Piper and his son start to leave, Hogan even slaps him in the back of the head a couple times. Piper kneels in the corner with his son and once Colt gives him the word, Piper is all over Hogan and Bischoff. During the brawl, Piper gets the title belt and scares everybody away as he holds the WCW world title over his head like a champ. In other words, he accepts the title shot at Superbrawl after all.

Overall a pretty boring show, but a GREAT final segment which is what makes southern wrestling better in my opinion by making the main event angle that much more personal than you would see like for example in the WWF. Hollywood Hogan, the most hated man in wrestling at that point, in the ring with the man he hates the most and his KID there with him too. If you can suspend your disbelief long enough, any parent watching that cares about their own child would probably find that fairly nerve racking.

While most of the wrestlers were talking about Lex Luger, our three commentators sure didn’t seem to be all that concerned about his “condition”. Geez, hopefully they follow up on that next week.