WWE: Unforgiven 2007
September 16, 2007
Memphis, TN
FedEx Forum

The current WWE champions are as follows:
WWE Champion: John Cena (9/17/2006)
WWE Intercontinental Champion: Jeff Hardy (9/3/2007)
World Tag Team Champions: Lance Cade & Trevor Murdoch (9/8/2007)
WWE Women’s Champion: Candice Michelle (6/24/2007)
ECW Champion: CM Punk (9/4/2007)
World Heavyweight Champion: The Great Khali (7/20/2007)
WWE United States Champion: MVP (5/20/2007)
WWE Tag Team Champions: MVP & Matt Hardy (8/31/2007)
WWE Cruiserweight Champion: Hornswoggle (7/22/2007)

Read along if you have the WWE Network!

Your hosts are Jim Ross & Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole & JBL, and Joey Styles & Tazz.

• ECW Championship: CM Punk (c) vs. Elijah Burke
  

With John Morrison out on suspension, they really had no choice but to give this match to Burke. They do some faux MMA stuff to start. Burke cuts off Punk with an elbow, but Punk does a floatover out of the corner and delivers a Russian legsweep. Punk punishes Burke with some kicks. Backbreaker gets two. Burke catches a boot out of the corner and spins Punk around to sit him on the ropes before sending his head crashing to the mat. Now Burke pulls back on the arms and places a knee in between the shoulder blades. Punk mule kicks him away into the corner and hits the Running Knee and Bulldog. Here comes the Springboard Clothesline for two. Burke rolls out and yanks Punk off the apron to cause him to CRASH on the floor. Well, that’ll surely turn the tide. Back in, Burke locks in a Boston crab. I enjoyed seeing Punk try to fight him off and not just roll right into the hold. Punk reaches the ropes, but Burke holds onto Punk for some Rolling Germans. An STO gets two. Burke applies a nice inverted Texas Cloverleaf. He gets frustrated when Punk won’t quit. Punk hits him with a desperate enziguri, but then Burke lands the 4-UP for 1-2-NO! Then out of nowhere, Punk grabs Burke while laying on his backside and rolls up Burke for the random three-count. (11:54) This was fairly disjointed with Punk hitting his comeback moves way too early. The story just made very little sense. He’s getting the crap beaten out of him for several minutes, but then has the mindset to surprise Burke with a rollup? Come on. I guess that sudden finish means Burke will be getting a rematch. Besides that, there’s really no other serious contenders on ECW right now. *½

Recap of the Matt Hardy and MVP rivalry airs.

• WWE Tag Team Championship: MVP & Matt Hardy (c) vs. Deuce & Domino (w/Cherry)
  

Deuce and Domino now have black t-shirts. As they are, they just look like a couple of Fonzie imitators instead of someone like Johnny Strabler who rebels against everything. I thought there was some real dark potential in these characters that they failed to capitalize on here. First off, I would never have made Cherry a sister of Domino. She would have just been Deuce’s gal pal. MVP and Matt have quite a long discussion about who should start. Domino wants to box, but MVP wants to wrestle and armdrags and slams him around. Tag to Hardy, he catches Deuce with a swinging neckbreaker. More arguing between the tag champs. Back to MVP, he delivers the corner clothesline and running bulldog to mock Hardy. Matt tags himself in and hits the flying elbow to Domino. BALLIN’ elbow drop from Matt, but Deuce has had enough and sneaks in to slam Matt down by his greasier hair. That turns the tide as Hardy becomes *your* face in peril. MVP stands there in the corner and shakes his head. He comes back with a Side Effect on Deuce, but Domino cuts off the tag. Deuce & Domino give Matt the ROCKER PLEX for 1-2-NO! Where’s this team been? Matt forces Deuce into a corner and brings him out with a bulldog while catching Domino with a clothesline. One of the dumber moves in the match, Deuce prevents a tag to MVP and pulls Matt away for a short-arm clothesline, but Matt just ducks the clothesline and walks right into MVP for the tag. He’s a house of fire and goes for the BALLIN’ elbow drop on Deuce. Matt blind tags him and runs MVP into Domino for payback from their tag title win. TWIST OF FATE to Deuce! That gets the three-count to retain the titles. (9:19) Crowd finally got into it there at the end. Deuce and Domino have to feel like their futures could be “future endeavor’d” after a match like this where they are basically just tackling dummies. **¼

They air a Rey Mysterio interview that was a WWE Mobile Exclusive until now. He puts over the Great Khali’s head vice hold. Cole brings up the fact that “wrestling experts” believe Rey has no chance. You can fill in the blanks about what Rey has to say about that.

• Triple H vs. Carlito
  

So Coach decided that Carlito can’t be disqualified meaning he can do whatever he has to do to beat Triple H, but Triple H can’t so much as *look* for a sledgehammer because he’s DQ’ed. It doesn’t make it seem like Coach is setting up “insurmountable odds” for Triple H so much as WWE thinks no one would believe Carlito stands a chance against Triple H when it’s totally fair and square. Helmsley runs through Carlito to start like he’s no big deal. Carlito rolls out and brings a trash can into the mix. There’s a brawl on the floor where Triple H ducks a chairshot up against the ringpost. He starts backing Carlito into the guardrail and the ringpost and then takes him into the ring to work the lower back. He grabs an ab stretch and uses the ropes for the lulz. When Carlito gets free, he tries to unhook a TV monitor. Triple H won’t even let that happen and tosses Carlito over the ECW announce table. Finally, Carlito gets an edge over Triple H by whacking him with the ring bell. He finds some A/V cables and chokes Triple H in the ring. Carlito wants to spit some apple at Triple H, but Hunter punches him in the face. He uses the trash can on Helmsley until he can get a nearfall. There’s a back suplex on the can, but Triple H kicks out at two. He brings in a third trash can and wedges it in the corner. Triple H reverses the whip and swings Carlito back in an empty corner to prevent getting DQ’ed himself. There’s the High Knee and then the Facebuster connects for two. Triple H pounds Carlito down into a corner and almost gets DQ’ed, but he’s got until the COUNT OF FIVE. Carlito throws some powder in Hunter’s eyes and comes after him with a chair, but Triple H catches him for the AA Spinebuster. HE NO-SELLS THE POWDER. Triple H grabs a chair and when the ref takes it away from him, Triple H low blows Carlito to set up the PEDIGREE. (10:41) Even with the cards stacked against him, Triple H still had no problem beating Carlito. **

In the back, Maria grabs a word with Batista. He hits on her and who can blame him for trying. The talking is done and tonight is the night he leaves as the world champ for the third time.

• WWE Women’s Championship: Candice Michelle (c) vs. Beth Phoenix
  

This is Beth’s first big shot at the women’s title after winning the battle royal last month at SummerSlam. Ross compares Phoenix to Bull Nakano. Candice’s music really makes me want to hit the mute button. Phoenix tosses Candice around to start because she’s just that strong. Candice does a fancy lucha armdrag, but Phoenix blocks the tilt-a-whirl headscissors and gives her a backbreaker. Phoenix finds a double arm chicken wing, which was awesome. Ricky Steamboat would be proud. There’s a backbreaker on the shoulders, but Candice will not give up. Candice wiggles out of the hold and hits a neckbreaker. She delivers the Edge-o-Matic out of the corner, but then Phoenix forces her back into a corner and drops Candice with a military press. Cover, 1-2-NO! The crowd only slightly cares. You can see part of Candice’s weave left in the ring. While Phoenix has Candice in her arms, Candice slides over her head into a crucifix and scores the shocking pinfall. (7:07) Is it really that shocking though? I don’t think so. Now Phoenix is PISSED. Good luck, Candice. *½

In the back, Todd Grisham checks in with the Great Khali and Ranjin Singh. Khali says things. He squashes with his bare hands a cantaloupe that’s wearing a Rey Mysterio mask. Hilarious. Try a watermelon without the mask. Simple enough.

• World Heavyweight Championship: The Great Khali (c) (w/Ranjin Singh) vs. Rey Mysterio vs. Batista
  

Rey gets tossed aside so the big boys can play. He might as well take a seat and let these two destroy each other. Bats and Khali beat each other up in the corner. When Rey comes in, Batista whips him into Khali. Mysterio sneaks a rollup on Bats though for two. He staggers Batista with a tilt-a-whirl headscissors and delivers the wheelbarrow bulldog for another nearfall. La Silla connects on Bats, but Rey stands up and walks right into a boot from Khali. Time for the VICE GRIP on Batista, but Bats blocks the hold only to charge into the BRAIN CHOP. Oh boy. VICE GRIP is applied. Rey whacks Khali with a steel chair to break the hold and takes a punch to the face. With Bats already on the floor, Khali goes out and throws him over the announce table so he has no opposition to stop him from destroying Mysterio. You know, in theory. Rey can only stay away from Khali for so long before he’s cornered. There’s a short-arm clothesline. Rey fights out of a nerve hold, but walks into another big boot. VICE GRIP time! Bats wakes up and jumps Khali. He knocks Khali back into the ropes to get him all tied up. Batista punches the crap out of him while the crowd counts along with him. Rey headscissors away the Demon Bomb though and hits 619 to not just Bats, but also Khali! La Silla to Khali! Bats grabs Rey and DEMON BOMBS him onto Khali! Bats shoves Rey out of the ring simply because he wants Khali and gives Khali a Spinebuster for the three-count and the world title. (8:01) Match was way better than it had any right to be and the finish was pretty good. **½

They recap the big reveal that Vince McMahon’s bastard son was in fact Hornswoggle.

In the back, Triple H and Batista have a meeting. Hunter gave him a water and they hugged. Triple H tells him to remember that it was one thing to win the world title and another thing to keep it.

• World Tag Team Championship: Lance Cade & Trevor Murdoch (c) vs. Paul London & Brian Kendrick
  

Basic stuff like headlocks and shoulderblocks to start between Cade and Kendrick, but it looked really good. Murdoch comes in and tries a suplex, but Kendrick counters to a small package and grabs an armbar. They set up London double-stomping Murdoch’s arm. So much happening until Murdoch cuts off Kendrick with a back elbow. Tag to Cade, the Hooligans clean house and hit STEREO TOPE SUICIDAS. Back in, Kendrick whiffs trying a flying body press and gets tossed to the floor to try for the countout win. That sets him up as the face in peril. Cade knocks London off the apron and powerslams Kendrick out of the corner for two. Tag to Murdoch, he grabs a neck vice. Kendrick kicks him back, but Cade tags in and cuts off the tag. Murdoch heads up top, but flies down face first into a pair of boots. Hot tag to London, he goes DROPKICK CRAZY. The standing rana to Cade connects. Flying double stomp to the back gets two. Cade shuts him down with a boot in the corner, but Cade misses a flying elbow. The Standing SSP gets 1-2-NO! Murdoch saves the day. Kendrick tags in and hits a flying body press for 1-2-NO! Cade catches Kendrick with the inverted atomic drop and holds him in place for the running boot by Murdoch, but it only gets two. The match breaks down here. Murdoch shoves away Sliced Bread #2 and sends Kendrick off into a SITOUT SPINEBUSTER by Cade. Murdoch covers him and gets the win. (11:49) Ross thinks this is one of those standout tag team rivalries we’ve seen in years past on the RAW brand. What rivalries is he talking about exactly? Anyways, this was the match of the night, which saddens me. **¾

• WWE Championship: John Cena (c) vs. Randy Orton
  

John Cena’s dad is sitting in the front row. Orton considers slithering over to him until Cena’s music starts blaring. THE CHAMP IS HERE. This is the 364th day of Cena’s reign as WWE champ. Cena roughs up Orton to start with his slobberknocking ways. He tries the STFU early, but Orton gets away and rolls out to safety. He baits Cena to come after him and catches him with an uppercut as Cena comes through the ropes. Draping DDT gets two. They take turns mounting each other for punches. Cena misses a corner charge allowing Orton to grab his signature chinlock. Crowd is split on who they want to win. Cena powers out and hits a combination of punches. He corners Orton and won’t stop punching on him, so the ref DQ’s him. (7:21) A DQ in a title match? Could this PPV be any more useless? Afterwards, Orton goes after Mr. Cena and flips him over the rail. Cena Jr. saves the day and locks Orton in the STFU. With Orton in place, Mr. Cena runs by and punts Orton in the head. *½

Backstage, Jonathan Coachman is screaming at Mr. Cena for what he did. He accuses him of coming to the show just to distract Orton, and because he knew Cena couldn’t beat him. He says Cena got himself purposely DQ’ed, and so Orton deserves another rematch. It won’t just be another standard rules match though; it will be a “last man standing” match. Suddenly, Cena Jr. ran up and throttled Coach telling him this was family, and that if Coach messes with his dad, he’s messing with him. Cena then shoved him down, hugs his dad, and off they went.

• The Undertaker vs. Mark Henry
  

This is the big return for the Undertaker. There’s burning UT symbols and everything. Not a single human being in Memphis believes there is a chance that Mark Henry would be pinning the Undertaker by the end of the night, right? Henry gives Taker a SUPERPLEX early on here. Yes, a superplex. They fight on the floor a little bit. Back in, Henry hits the SPLASH and only gets two. He delivers another one, but Taker will not die. Yeah, that line doesn’t make sense to me either. Taker avoids a third splash, but Henry goes back to work on him. Taker starts up his comeback and hits Old School. There’s the Chokeslam. Henry fights off the Last Ride and applies his BEARHUG. They end up in the corner where Henry does the ten-count punch thing only for Taker to actually give him the LAST RIDE for the win. (11:27) That finish was pretty brutal and I mean that in a good way. *

Final Thoughts: This had to be the worst, most useless PPV of the year. Other than Batista getting the win and the Undertaker returning, everything is exactly as it was before. There’s not a single three star match on the card. This was the epitome of an average show. To be fair though, this PPV did come at a really bad time for WWE with all the suspensions. I don’t think it ever gets this bad again at the PPV level in 2007 so we have that going for us, but I’m also not expecting it will be as good as it was in the first four months. Thumbs down for Unforgiven 2007.