WWF: Capital Carnage
December 6, 1998
London, England
London Arena

The current WWF champs are as follows:
WWF Champion: The Rock (11/15/1998)
Intercontinental Champion: Ken Shamrock (10/12/1998)
World Tag Team Champions: The New Age Outlaws (8/30/1998)
European Champion: X-Pac (10/18/1998)
Light Heavyweight Champion: Duane Gill (11/23/1998)
Hardcore Champion: The Big Boss Man (11/30/1998)
Women’s Champion: Sable (11/15/1998)

WE’RE IN BLOODY OL’ ENGLAND! Your hosts are Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler. Unfortunately, this is the last we’ll hear from Jim Ross until WrestleMania XV due to a Bell’s Palsy attack. On the plus side though, at least this time he wasn’t fired. I mean, what company would fire a man due to an uncontrollable medical condition? Can you imagine?

• Al Snow (w/Head) vs. Gangrel

Lawler is surprised people love “head” across the pond. Feeling out process to start. Snow delivers his headbutts and wheelbarrow suplex for two. He comes off the top with a flying bodypress for another nearfall. Gangrel comes back with the Impaler DDT for two. He runs down Snow a few times with clotheslines. As Gangrel slows down the match, the crowd chants for Head. Side Russian legsweep by Gangrel gets two. Snow comes back with a northern lights suplex when Edge and Christian head down. He misses a Lionsault as Gangrel fires back with an arm trap suplex. He puts Snow on the top rope, but Snow hits a tornado DDT. Christian distracts the ref as Snow grabs Head. Why does Ross think Head is wooden? He whacks Gangrel, but turns around into a missile dropkick by Edge. Gangrel covers Snow and gets the three-count. (5:54) Gangrel is a good opponent for Snow, but I feel like they could have done better. *½  

Mankind is back in the boiler room of the London Arena and claims it’s the coldest boiler room he’s ever been in. He hypes up tonight’s main event and tells us to have a nice day.

• LOD 2000 vs. The Headbangers

Ironic that Droz’s thing now is that he hurts people considering how his career ended. Anywho, Droz and Mosh start the match. Despite being the heels, Droz goes DROPKICK CRAZY as the crowd chants for Hawk. In comes Thrasher, Droz gives him a big powerslam to boos. Headbangers give Droz the Leapfrog Stun Gun, but Droz still manages to tag Animal. He runs through both Mosh and Thrasher. Animal powerslams Mosh, but Thrasher breaks up the pin. Droz rolls Animal out of the ring, but Mosh rolls him up for the three-count making Droz looking like a j-bron. (3:21) Animal and Droz end up shoving each other around until a bunch of referees break up the tiff. ¾*

They show us the ambulance shenanigans from last week’s RAW leading to Austin and Kane dropping Paul Bearer into a sewer.

Michael Cole interviews the Undertaker and Paul Bearer in the locker room. Taker asks Cole to pray for Steve Austin’s soul. Tonight at Capital Carnage, Austin will pay for his sins before Taker turns him over to the hounds of hell. Take a long look, Austin – the end is near.

They show a video package highlighting the end of the affair between Val Venis and Terri Runnels. Being connected to Terri, Goldust gets in the middle of the thing. Somehow Marc Mero gets his nuts kicked in by Terri. WHAT A MESS.

• Goldust vs. Val Venis

I feel like this feud is already somewhat settled since Goldust has moved onto Jeff Jarrett and revealing Debra’s tasty cakes. It looks like Goldust is swinging his dick around in front of the crowd while he’s taking off his robe here. Pretty wild stuff. Big brawl to start as they quickly end up on the floor where Goldust uses the ring steps on Val. Back in, Venis stomps Goldust down into a corner, but Goldust comes back with a whip reversal and clotheslines Venis down. Goldust delivers a slingshot back suplex as Ross explains how Vince McMahon got to speak at Oxford University this past week. Venis comes back with a clothesline for two. The Kobashi knees sets up a Russian Legsweep from Val. He stands over top of Goldust for the Rick Rude pose. Goldust comes right back with a running bulldog for two. Venis hits a spinebuster for a nearfall. He heads up top for a flying bodypress, but Goldust rolls through for a two-count. Venis hits a Fisherman’s Suplex for two. Double KO knocks Goldust back into the ropes where he then falls forward and lands head-first on the Big Valbowski. Time for Shattered Dreams. Val pulls ref Earl Hebner into harm’s way. While Goldust and Hebner argue, Venis surprises Goldust with a rollup for the three-count. (5:35) After the bell, Goldust jumps Venis and gives him SHATTERED DREAMS much to the London crowd’s delight. Match was a bunch of back and forth nothing though. *

We catch some footage of Vince McMahon bothering people at Oxford University. What could he possibly have to talk to them about?

Back in the London Arena, Vince McMahon comes out onto the stage and he’s joined by his son Shane, Pat Patterson, and Gerald Brisco. Patterson announces that tonight’s lineup has been changed: the Rock will defend his WWF championship against X-Pac (instead of Triple H who will now be wrestling Jeff Jarrett). The rumor and innuendo is due to Triple H not being ready for a main event match just yet. Gerald Brisco brings up soccer player Vinnie Jones who must be some sort of a rule breaker. I don’t know who that is. Shane McMahon starts the rumor that George Michael’s boyfriend is Vinnie Jones and refers to Vinnie as a “hard man”. Shane really needs to know details of their love lives for some reason. Now we hear from Vince McMahon who gets “asshole” chants and boos. Vince shares his opinion of England: first of all, tea time is a pile of pious crap (and throws away a tea cup). Secondly, history will prove that the British are the most barbaric, vile, swarmy people to ever walk the face of the earth. Thirdly, the British empire crumbled long ago with the exception of holding onto the Falkland Islands which they fought so hard to keep. And finally, British people all wish they were American. Since he already feels the British empire is done for, Vince thinks whatever is left of England will be gobbled up by the French and the Germans. McMahon feels the future of England will be a cesspool of decay, decadence, and debauchery. He also thinks the PM will one day be of Pakistani distinction. With one of the top baby names in Great Britain being “Muhammad” in 2021, Vince might be right on that one.

• Tiger Ali Singh vs. Edge

As if Great Britain hasn’t taken one on the chin enough tonight, Tiger Ali Singh comes out and talks crap about the way India was treated before he was ever born. This should have been an easy babyface match to showcase Edge here as he controls most of the match. He hits Singh with a missile dropkick, but Singh gets his foot on the bottom rope. Edge heads up top again, but Singh catches him in mid-air and puts his feet on the ropes for the three-count. (2:54) Umm, why? Afterwards, Edge complains to the ref and clotheslines Singh out to the floor. ½*

Ross and Lawler discuss how unfair it is that X-Pac has had no time to prepare for the Rock.

Michael Cole talks with soccer star Vinnie Jones. He gets the British crowd riled up and says he’ll handle anybody who provokes him tonight.

• Sable & Christian vs. Marc Mero & Jacqueline

This is Mero’s “one last obligation” since losing to Duane Gill last week on RAW. The rumor and innuendo is that Sable was originally slated to win the WWF Women’s title at *this* PPV instead of at Survivor Series, but they want to limit her “bumps” since the ink is still wet on her Playboy contract, so the match happened sooner rather than later.

Jacqueline attacks Mero before Christian and Sable make their entrances. Mero really turned into quite a LOSER. I don’t think anybody understands Sable’s random male partners throughout 1998. Ross and Lawler don’t seem to know how to talk about Sable without mentioning how hot she is. I mean, I GET IT – that’s why she’s here. It’s certainly not for her catch-as-catch-can abilities. She’s wearing LOADS of makeup here tonight. Lawler makes a Viagra joke stating it’s like being at Disney World – an hour wait for a two minute ride. HI-YO. The heels want nothing to do with the babyfaces if you can imagine. Christian pants Mero to further embarrass the man. Christian whips Mero into the ropes for a superkick from Sable. Big flying bodypress by Christian scores a nearfall. Sable starts chasing Jacqueline around ringside. Meanwhile, Mero delivers a Samoan drop and heads up top, but Christian crotches him on the top rope. Christian lands an inverted atomic drop and a spinning heel kick. Christian hits the Reverse DDT and tags out to Sable who gives Mero one last SABLE BOMB. Jacqueline tags in and gets flipped into the ring. Sable trips up Jacqueline for the ground and pound and some of the WORST punches you’ll ever seen. Christian chases after Mero who is about half way up the ramp. Sable hits the TKO on Jacqueline for the win. (4:50) Afterwards, Jacqueline attacks Tim White and ends up on his shoulders as Sable RIPS OFF Jackie’s t-shirt to show her boobies to the audience, which gets blurred of course on the WWE Network. Lots of heat or not, this sucked. ¾*

Backstage, Kane is WALKING.

• WWF Intercontinental Championship: Ken Shamrock (c) (w/the Big Boss Man) vs. Steve Blackman

These two go back and forth to start. Shamrock stuns Blackman with a powerslam and a snap suplex gets two. He keeps Blackman down for a long while. Ross is concerned about the Big Boss Man being at ringside. There’s eventually a mild comeback by Blackman. He gives Shamrock a spinebuster and gets a two-count. Shamrock finds a fisherman’s suplex for a two-count. Blackman lands a jumping shoulderblock to send Shamrock rolling out to the floor. Meanwhile, Blackman knocks Boss Man down with a baseball slide, but then gets his ankle whacked with a “metal baton”. And with that, Shamrock grabs the ANKLELOCK for the submission victory. (6:51) One of the more enjoyable undercard matches, but Blackman just proved you don’t mess with the Big Boss Man. **

Michael Cole gets verbally assaulted by the Rock backstage. Rock brags about getting a “corporate email” last week stating there was no way Triple H could compete against the Rock. As for X-Pac, the Rock has already beaten that “bony jabroni” with the Corporate Elbow. Rock plans on layin’ the smackdown on X-Pac’s candy ass. He then starts quoting all these other famous wrestlers, but winds up asking IF YOU SMELL LALALALAOW WHAT THE ROCK IS COOKIN’?

• Triple H (w/Chyna) vs. Jeff Jarrett (w/Debra)

This is Triple H’s first singles matches back since his knee injury at SummerSlam. Not to mention this is the only 1-on-1 meeting between Jarrett and Triple H – EVER. Headlocks and shoulderblocks to start. About a minute in, Jarrett knocks Triple H to the floor with a back elbow. Back inside, Triple H rolls through a flying bodypress for a nearfall. Jarrett comes back with the armbreaker DDT. Debra chokes Triple H in the ropes a little bit – to the point that Chyna gets involved to scare her off. Jarrett grabs a sleeperhold. The arm drops once, twice, BUT NOT THREE TIMES! Triple H counters with a back suplex. He blocks Jarrett’s punches and returns fire. Triple H lands the High Knee and an inverted atomic drop connects. Here comes the ten-count corner punch. Jarrett counters the Pedigree, but Triple H stops the catapult. He hits the HHH Facebuster and clotheslines Jarrett out. While Debra gets up on the apron to flirt with Triple H, his man beast of a woman runs Debra away. Ref Tim White talks with Chyna while Debra literally gets in the ring to tempt Triple H. In comes Jarrett with a chair. When Triple H tells Debra “suck it”, she goes to slap him which gets Tim White further involved. Meanwhile, Chyna stops Jarrett with the chair. Triple H no longer cares about what’s going on with Debra and drops Jarrett with the PEDIGREE for the win. (6:55) I think Triple H should feel good about that match. He was able to work the match and do the spots he’s used to doing with some chicanery going on there. **½

Michael Cole interviews Stone Cold Steve Austin backstage. He’s PISSED OFF and it doesn’t look good for Mankind, Kane, and the Undertaker.

We catch the former Euro champion D’Lo Brown messing around in London this past weekend. D’Lo is *so* underrated. Check out the disposable camera.

• WWF World Tag Team Championship: The New Age Outlaws (c) vs. D’Lo Brown & Mark Henry

As they are everywhere they go in 1998, the New Age Outlaws are SUPER over. Brown jumps Road Dogg to start, but winds up taking the Shake Rattle and Roll followed by the Shaky Knee Drop. Back in, Gunn gives D’Lo a press slam and levels him with a clothesline as D’Lo takes a powder. Crotch chops all around! Billy seems extra coked up tonight. Henry helps D’Lo regain his composure. Back in the ring, D’Lo lets Gunn know what he thinks of him and tags out to Henry. Time for a test of strength. Gunn goes low, but runs into a bearhug and gets swung around like a ragdoll. Gunn pops the eardrums and comes back with clotheslines. Since Henry won’t go down, Road Dogg comes in for a double dropkick to take him down and a double hiptoss for D’Lo. Once things settle down, Road Dogg becomes *your* Outlaw-in-peril. The crowd is really on D’Lo Brown here – and he makes sure to milk it for what it’s worth. He hits Road Dogg with the Sky High and tags in Henry. The Jumping Leg Drop connects followed by the JUMPING SPLASH gets two. Gunn breaks up the pin, nails D’Lo, and drags Road Dogg over to his corner for the easy tag. WHAT. Gunn starts throwing clotheslines and while he’s got D’Lo in the corner for the ten-count corner punch, he flies into Henry’s arms only to get powerslammed. D’Lo lets Henry know he’s got this under control, but then gets nailed with the FAMOUSER. Once both guys are up, Gunn cradles Brown for a nearfall. Henry makes the save. Gunn delivers a PILEDRIVER for the three-count. (10:11) Man, this was good, but could have been MUCH better. Road Dogg is still selling the splash from Henry and the abrupt finish makes you wonder how he’s really doing here. **½

They show us an awesome video package showing Vince’s master plan to put the WWF title on the Rock at Survivor Series. I mean, it really was MASTERFUL.

• WWF Championship: The Rock (c) vs. X-Pac (w/Chyna & Triple H)

Pretty wild to think these two are the same age despite the big difference in experience. X-Pac controls early with armbars. As they run the ropes, they even do a CRISS-CROSS at one point which you don’t see much in the WWF. X-Pac switches to a headlock. Rock escapes and as he tries a leapfrog, X-Pac sees it coming and puts on the brakes before giving him a crotch chop. Rock misses a shot on X-Pac and gets wiped out with THREE roundhouse kicks to send Rock falling out to the floor. DOWN GOES THE ROCK! DOWN GOES THE ROCK! He decides to grab his WWF title and walk out on the match – because he calls the shots. Triple H and Chyna walk out to make sure Rock returns to the ring. Back inside, X-Pac misses the Bronco Buster. Triple H and Chyna head down to ringside to make sure X-Pac gets a fair shake. Rock runs down X-Pac with a clothesline for two. Swinging neckbreaker on X-Pac garners the same result. Out to the floor we go, Rock bounces X-Pac’s head off the announce table. He drinks JR’s diet coke and gets it punched out of his mouth by X-Pac. Whoops. Rock thumbs X-Pac in the eye to turn the tide. Back in the ring, it’s chinlock time. X-Pac fights up only to run into a knee. As Rock gets Triple H to hop up on the apron thus distracting the referee, he then goes over and punches X-Pac in the nuts. Back to the chinlock. X-Pac escapes but runs into a back elbow. Rock slams X-Pac and delivers the CORPORATE ELBOW for 1-2-NO! X-PAC KICKS OUT! X-PAC KICKS OUT! More chinlockage. X-Pac manages another escape. While Triple H has ref Earl Hebner’s attention, X-Pac tries the X-Factor, but Rock counters to a Rock Bottom only for Chyna to sneak in with a low blow to stop the Rock! X-Pac rolls up Rock for 1-2-NO! X-Pac lands a spinning heel kick for another nearfall. He comes off the top with a flying bodypress, but Rock rolls through and gets a foot on the bottom rope for two. X-Pac hits his kick combo in the corner, but then gets whipped into Earl Hebner. Rock goes out, slugs Triple H, and grabs the WWF title again. He brings the WWF title into the ring to whack X-Pac, but Triple H whacks Rock with the Euro title instead. X-Pac crawls over to Rock for 1-2-NO! X-Pac lands the Bronco Buster after all and Rock rolls out. When Rock puts his hands on Chyna, Triple H EXPLODES on him to cost X-Pac the WWF title via DQ. (12:34) After Rock talks more smack on the mic, Triple H and X-Pac jump Rock. Ken Shamrock runs down to help out, but Triple H gets rid of him as well. WHAT. This needed a better finish, but it wasn’t half bad. ***

• Gerald Brisco as Special Guest Referee and the Big Boss Man as Special Guest Enforcer: Steve Austin vs. Kane vs. Mankind vs. The Undertaker (w/Paul Bearer)

Shane McMahon is the special guest ring announcer. He introduces *your* special guest timekeeper Pat Patterson, *your* special guest referee Gerald Brisco, *your* special guest commentator Vince McMahon, and *your* corporate enforcer the Big Boss Man. SINCE WHEN? THAT’S NOT RIGHT. Tony Chimel introduces Vinnie Jones. It looks like he wants to start something with the Big Boss Man. He shoves Boss Man through the ropes and McMahon is HOT. Brisco manages to calm down Boss Man and throws a red card at Vinnie Jones. WHAT. Shane gets on the mic and announces Vinnie Jones has been ejected.

Okay, moving on. Mankind and Kane are the first two out to the ring – and they start brawling. Where’s Austin and Taker? The bell rings despite only two guys being in the ring. Out comes Taker and Paul Bearer. Kane knocks Mankind into a CHOKESLAM by the Undertaker. Taker then dumps out Mankind and Kane as the GLASS BREAKS and here comes Austin. He meets Austin in the aisleway and you can start to hear Ross having his problems. It seems to be Austin and Kane against Taker and Mankind right now. It eventually calms down to the point Taker and Austin brawl in the ring while Kane and Mankind fight around ringside. Vince reverts back to his usual promoter commentary style, which is pretty hilarious. Taker and Mankind end up back on the floor while Kane brawls with Austin. Now they all end up near the announce table as everybody starts choking another person with a camera cable. Mankind starts hitting Taker and Kane with a microphone – not Austin though. Tons of meaningless Attitude Era brawling here. At one point, it looked like Mankind and Austin were going to work together. Mankind wants a handshake, but Austin doesn’t trust anybody. He tries to hit the Stone Cold Stunner, but Mankind shoves him away and applies the MANDIBLE CLAW. Taker grabs Mankind by the ankles and trips him up to pull him nuts-first into the ringpost. The Brothers of Destruction start working over Austin. Mankind puts on Mr. Socko and joins Taker and Kane to beat up Austin, but then Taker and Kane decide to slug Mankind down. A chair gets brought into the mix. Kane wants to Tombstone Austin on the chair, but Mankind saves the day even though Taker kicks him out to the floor. Now Mankind brings his own chair to the dance. He cracks Kane with the chair across the back, but then Taker wipes out Mankind with a chairshot to the face. As he covers Mankind, Austin whacks Taker across the back with a chair. Austin covers Taker, but Brisco naturally fails to count like a normal referee. Taker boots down Austin, but then Kane clotheslines Taker to the floor out to Mankind. Austin avoids the Chokeslam from Kane and hits him with a STONE COLD STUNNER. Instead of counting the pinfall, Brisco checks with Patterson on the time. Austin punches down Brisco. Taker goes CHOKESLAM CRAZY on Austin and Kane. He then covers Austin, but there’s no ref. Earl Hebner runs down and counts the pinfall, but Mankind breaks up the pin. While Mankind and Taker brawl on the floor, Austin hits Kane with another STONE COLD STUNNER for the win. (16:05) After the match, Brisco slugs Hebner for getting involved. Of course, Brisco then turns around into a STONE COLD STUNNER. Big Boss Man doesn’t bother with Austin and checks on Brisco instead. I wasn’t really feeling this match as much as others since you didn’t feel like there was much drama to it. You were just kind of waiting around for Austin to stun somebody for the pinfall. **½

Vinnie Jones comes back out to the ring and kicks Boss Man into a STONE COLD STUNNER. With Boss Man down and out, EARL HEBNER gets to stomp Boss Man out of the ring and throws up some middle fingers for him. In the end, Austin, Jones, and Hebner share a beer to close out the show.

Final Thoughts: I don’t think I’m breaking any new ground here to say this felt like a house show in front of a hot crowd. There’s no new story development, no title changes, and not exactly a bunch of great matches. Capital Carnage is just average and nothing really to check into unless maybe you’re a HUGE fan of X-Pac. Even then, it was a little disappointing. Thumbs down for the one and only Capital Carnage PPV.