Lucha Underground
January 21, 2015
Los Angeles, CA
The Temple

Your hosts are Matt Striker and Brother Vampiro.

• The Crew (w/Bael) vs. Mascarita Sagrada & Pimpinela Escarlata
  

The Crew makes up Cortez Castro and Cisco. Excuse me, that’s Mr. Cisco. Striker explains Escarlata as Charo and Liberace having a child. That’s actually spot on. Escarlata immediately tries to kiss ref Rick Knox and he is not down with that. Probably why he got his broken arm. He turned down Escarlata. Anyways, Escarlata dominates the Crew to start by walking the ropes and taking them down with an armdrag and headscissors. Big Ryck comes out and sits on the steps while he smokes his stogie. Escarlata gets caught down in the corner and eats a bunch of face washes and dropkicks. They dish out more violence with a curb stomp. It doesn’t come off too well though. Hot tag to Sagrada, he’s got the headscissors and tilt-a-whirl DDTs for Cisco. The Crew finally catch him with a kick, but then Sagrada floats out to the floor with a tope suicida on Bael. Escarlata delivers another rope walking armdrag, gets it a kiss, and splashes the Crew on the floor. Nevertheless, Cisco and Castro give Sagrada the flapjack/codebreaker finish for the pinfall while Bael holds onto Escarlata. (4:48) Glorified squash here for the Crew. Big Ryck gets in the ring and has Cisco hold his cigar while he speaks. He wants everybody to know – including the Crew – that he’s here to take the Lucha Underground championship from whoever has the gold, for we must all appear before the judgment of Big Ryck. Well, the Crew have had enough and turn on their boss. Interesting that people are booing this. Castro finds a kendo stick and beats Ryck. While Bael and Castro hold him down, Cisco puts the cigar out on Big Ryck’s eye. TAKING CARE OF BUSINESS, BRO. Now that they have succeeded, the Crew head straight into Dario Cueto’s office. *½

When we come back from commercial, we see Dario Cueto paying the Crew handsomely for their deeds. They definitely work for him as they refer to Cueto as “sir” now.

Earlier in the day, Vampiro sat down with Cage to see what he’s all about. No idea what his reason was for doing what he did to Prince Puma last week because my copy of the show has no sound.

• Pentagon Jr. vs. Super Fly
  

Both these guys look for their first victory in Lucha Underground here. Super Fly catches Pentagon with a nice superkick, but quebradas back into a backcracker from Pentagon for two. To the floor, Pentagon gives Super Fly an Attitude Adjustment. Back in, there’s a double-KO. Now the mystery Asian chick is wearing a Lucha Underground crew shirt. What’s her deal?! Lots of flips from Super Fly. He threads Pentagon into falling out to the floor for a SPACE FLYING TIGER DROP. Back inside, Pentagon blocks a quebrada with a dropkick to the guts. Cover, 1-2-NO! Sling Blade by Pentagon doesn’t get the job done, but the FEAR FACTOR does. (5:08) Lots of fun as these two really tried to get the victory over the other. Afterwards, Pentagon Jr. calls Chavo Guerrero a fraud and knows someone who will help him. Blue Demon Jr., perhaps? Nevertheless, SIN MIEDO! **½

• Sexy Star vs. El Mariachi Loco
  

We get a waistlock exchange in the ring as Mariachi – the jokester jobber of Lucha Underground – shakes his hips around Sexy Star. I’m pretty sure under the mask he’s Rickety Cricket: hips and nips. Otherwise, he ain’t eating. Sexy Star kicks him around to start, but then she gets chopped in the corner. To the floor, Sexy Star dives on top of Mariachi. Back inside, she hits Mariachi with a flying armdrag. She gets caught though and dropped on the top rope. Mariachi takes too long up top and misses a flying senton bomb as Sexy Star grabs him for an inside cradle for the win. (3:50) Well, good for her. *

• Last Luchador Standing: Drago vs. King Cuerno
  

Drago goes for the kill early with a somersault plancha. Orton-style DDT puts Cuerno down for the count of six. To the floor again, Drago flies into a Running Ligerbomb. He’s up at seven, but then Cuerno kicks him hard in the gut. Back in the ring, Cuerno holds onto Drago for a pile of suplexes. Drago fires back with the floatover neckbreaker. The ref gets pulled down in front of Drago as he springs off the ref and headscissors Cuerno down. While Cuerno is on the apron, Drago runs and leaps over the top rope and headscissors him down to the floor. After he kicks Drago around, Cuerno delivers the tope suicida. He sets up a table and gets flipped back into the ring by Drago. We could see a SUPER SPANISH FLY off the apron, but Cuerno has other plans and lifts up Drago for the THRILL OF THE HUNT instead through the table! They have been teasing that move off the apron for weeks now and it finally pays off. Drago is on his hands and knees at the count of eight, so now Cuerno is pissed. He gave Drago his best shot and Drago still gets up. In the ring, Cuerno runs and dropkicks Drago down in the corner. While Drago is out of it, Cuerno finds some rope and ties Drago to the ringpost to keep him down for the win. (11:24) Funny how Cena did this same finish to Batista one time, but everybody thinks this is a real dick move. These type of wins feel like a cheap way out of a decisive finish though and I don’t really care for it. ***

But hey, there’s two things I can do about it: nothing and like it.

And with that said, I will leave you with this.

NEXT WEEK: Nothing announced.