TNA: iMPACT! (12.24.05)
December 24, 2005
The current TNA champs are as follows:
NWA World Champion: Jeff Jarrett (11/3/2005)
NWA World Tag Team Champions: America’s Most Wanted (10/22/2005)
TNA X-Division Champion: Samoa Joe (12/11/2005)
Your hosts are Mike Tenay and Don West.
Santa Claus (Matt Bentley) and his Little Helper (Traci Brooks) head to the ring. Naturally, Santa has a sack full of presumably gifts with him as well. For some reason, this interests Christian Cage as he heads out. He’s started to wonder and doubt himself that he just doesn’t look how a world champion should. Christian is here to make sure Santa has all his presents. Santa reaches in his sack and pulls out a present for Christian. He takes the gift right out of Santa’s hands and tears it open to find some white pants – just like Jeff Jarrett wears! They are quite tight, but he manages to get them on. He comments on Traci’s nice bulbs. I’m sorry – I just *really* don’t understand her appeal. Now Christian wishes he had a catchphrase so that he could connect with the people better. Next, he pulls out a “Don’t Piss Me Off” t-shirt from the WWF. To complete the ensemble, Christian puts on a stupid blonde wig and some yellow tinted sunglasses.
Christian – “Don’t piss me off. Wow! That’s money.”
Now Christian says since being a world champion evidently means you can’t win matches on your own, maybe he needs a friend. Since Santa has — things to do (looking at you, Traci) — he leaves Christian with a gray ukulele. As Santa and Traci start to leave and Christian considers doing the Fargo Strut, Jeff Jarrett and Monty Brown head down to beat the crap out of him. I mean — isn’t it about time? They whip him into the ropes for a double-team. When Christian puts on the brakes and does the Fargo Strut, Jarrett and Monty chase him out to the floor. Once again, the lights start to flicker as Sting’s music hits to scare Jarrett as we go to commercial. This was actually pretty decent. I’ll allow it.
Backstage, Shane Douglas wants to know if Christopher Daniels has bitten off a little more than he can chew by coming back so quickly after his concussion. He tells Samoa Joe to do his worst because Daniels will steal his aura and take his X-Division title back. And that my friend, is GOSPEL.
- Christopher Daniels vs. Eric Young (w/Scott D’Amore)
Since apparently he can’t afford cable or a VCR or blank VHS tapes, Alex Shelley brings his handicam with him to ringside. FIND A GOODWILL, BRO. Shannon Moore still thinks that the X-Division needs to get punk’d as he stands up on top of the tunnel. Both men take turns heading to the floor trying to fool the other. Back inside, Daniels scores with his STO for two. Young considers a moonsault, but Daniels is there to flip him back on the mat. Uranage sets up the BME for 1-2-NO! When that doesn’t get the three-count, the ANGEL’S WINGS do. (3:10) Just a quick return match for Daniels. ¾*
Backstage, Bullet Bob Armstrong tries to talk some sense into getting 3LK back together. BG and Kip James want nothing to do with them. Konnan isn’t here, but Ron Killings is. Bullet Bob instructs them not to do anything until he talks to Truth.
- Abyss (w/James Mitchell) vs. Chris Sabin
Sabin gets in some hopeful kicks on Abyss to send him out to the floor. Abyss counters what Sabin is trying and swings him head first into the steps a couple times. Hey, Dave Hebner is out here again taking notes! What’s his deal. Back inside, Abyss avalanches Sabin, but he fights back with a series of kicks. Springboard dropkick takes Abyss back into a corner. Now he lands a springboard tornado DDT to take Abyss off his feet for 1-2-NO! There’s no way a Cradle Shock will work, so he springboards into the BLACK HOLE SLAM. (4:45) Fun little squash there as Abyss uses Sabin’s plan against him. *½
- Ron Killings vs. Kenny King
King BUM RUSHES THE SHOW and blasts Killings with a spinning heel kick. When he shows his cockiness, Killings fires back with a missile dropkick. Jumping Heel Kick sets up the Truth Conviction, which leads to the SCISSORS KICK. Cover, 1-2-3. (1:22) Afterwards, Bullet Bob is out on the ramp. Before he can say anything, Truth confirms that 3LK is done and goes back to dancing around like an idiot.
Raven-Zbyszko feud video montage airs.
- Chris Harris (w/James Storm & Gail Kim) vs. Christian Cage
James Storm gets sent back to the locker room before the match even begins for grabbing Christian’s ankle. It’s shoulderblocks and hiptosses to start. When the ref’s back is turned, Gail Kim grabs Christian’s foot and causes him to give chase, which sets him up for a sneaky clothesline by Harris. Back inside, Harris lands a flying double sledge for two. Stalling suplex leads to a chinlock, but Christian fights out only to get drilled by a jumping clothesline. As Christian starts to get fired up, Harris yanks him into the second rope for Gail Kim to do her thing. Harris gets dumped on the floor and comes back in trying the double sledge again, but Christian sees it coming and catches him on the way down. Spinning heel kick leads to the Tornado DDT for 1-2-NO! Gail Kim tries to stop Christian again and does so, but Christian shoves away the superplex. FROG SPLASH? Nope. No water in the pool. Harris avoids the Unprettier by going to the eyes and hits the Full Nelson Slam for 1-2-NO! He tries to use the handcuffs like brass knuckles, but Christian ducks and delivers the Reverse DDT for a nearfall. When ref Rudy Charles finds the handcuffs, he gets into a tug of war with Gail Kim. That distraction allows James Storm to return and blindside Christian with one of the tag belts. Slow cover gets 1-2-NO! They try their finishers, but nothing lands. Heel miscommunication though between AMW screws up Harris enough that Christian can hit the UNPRETTIER for the three-count. (7:30) Nice back and forth piece of work there putting Christian over another member of Planet Jarrett without making it look easy.
After the bell, Jeff Jarrett and Monty Brown finally get their hands on Christian. AMW joins them as they whip Christian in for the POUNCE-ah, period. As if the Pounce wasn’t enough, Jarrett hits Christian with the STROKE-ah on one of the NWA tag belts.
Until next time, so long for now.
TNA presents Final Resolution LIVE on January 15 from Universal Studios in Orlando, FL. Here is the card as it appears as of 12/24/05:
MAIN EVENT: Nothing announced
TNA X-Division Championship: Samoa Joe (c) vs. Christopher Daniels
Raven vs. Larry Zbyszko’s special opponent
Posted on April 13, 2015, in TNA and tagged 3 Live Kru, Abyss, America's Most Wanted, BG James, Bob Armstrong, Chris Harris, Chris Sabin, Christian, Christopher Daniels, Eric Young, Gail Kim, iMPACT, James Mitchell, James Storm, Jeff Jarrett, Kenny King, Kip James, Matt Bentley, Monty Brown, Ron Killings, Scott D'Amore, Shannon Moore, Sting, Team Canada, Traci Brooks. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.
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