WWE: Survivor Series
November 26, 2006
Philadelphia, PA
Wachovia Center

The current WWE champions are as follows:
WWE Champion: John Cena (9/17/2006)
WWE Intercontinental Champion: Jeff Hardy (11/13/2006)
World Tag Team Champions: Edge & Randy Orton (11/13/2006)
WWE Women’s Champion: Lita (11/5/2006)
ECW World Championship: Big Show (7/4/2006)
World Heavyweight Champion: King Booker (7/23/2006)
WWE United States Champion: Chris Benoit (10/13/2006)
WWE Tag Team Champions: Paul London & Brian Kendrick (5/21/2006)
WWE Cruiserweight Champion: Gregory Helms (1/29/2006)

Your hosts are Jim Ross & Jerry Lawler and Michael Cole & JBL.

• Survivor Series Elimination Match: Ric Flair, Sgt. Slaughter, Dusty Rhodes & Ron Simmons (w/Arn Anderson) vs. The Spirit Squad
  

Simmons replaces an injured Roddy Piper here tonight. If you’ll recall back at Cyber Sunday, Piper and Flair won the tag titles from the Spirit Squad and lost them the following week on RAW to Rated RKO. Simmons starts out here against Mikey and throws him around. Mitch trips him up as he comes off the ropes. Simmons goes out after Mitch and backs him up into Arn Anderson who posts him. Meanwhile, the ref is counting out Simmons at 1:55. Mitch is a second here for the other four Spirit Squad guys and gets sent to the back. Apparently the ref saw what AA did as well and orders him to return to the locker room. The crowd doesn’t care for that decision too much. Once a Horsemen town, always a Horsemen town. Now our three legends abuse Nicky. Slaughter finds the COBRA CLUTCH and once Nicky starts to fade, Johnny breaks the hold with a roundhouse kick to the back of the head. He puts Nicky on top of Slaughter for the three-count at 6:28. Now all Dusty has to do is drop the BIONIC ELBOW on Nicky for a pinfall at 6:58. Dusty gets cornered on the wrong side of town and fights out, but misses a charge in the corner and gets rolled up by Kenny to send him to the showers at 8:26. Now it’s three-on-Flair. Kenny makes sure to tell him that. Mikey corners Flair and goes for the ten-count punch, but Flair counters with an atomic drop and rolls him up with his feet on the ropes for the three-count at 9:16. Kenny rushes Flair and gives him a backdrop out of the corner. He whips Flair in the ropes for another backdrop and telegraphs it big time as Flair small packages him to take care of Kenny at 9:50. Johnny exchanges shots with Flair in the corner, but Flair wins the day as he escapes a headlock with a shinbreaker. Flair then clips the knee and applies the FIGURE-FOUR for the submission win. (10:34) Survivors: Ric Flair. Afterwards, the Spirit Squad come out and do a number on Flair. This is the last we will see of the Spirit Squad as they break up the next night on RAW after losing another handicap match where they have the advantage against DX and Ric Flair. Kenny will remain on WWE TV for a while as the rest of the boys will return to OVW. Of course Nicky will come back in 2008 and become the breakout star of the crew as we all now know best as Dolph Ziggler. **

• WWE U.S. Championship: Chris Benoit (c) vs. Chavo Guerrero (w/Vickie Guerrero)
  

Benoit has been sticking his nose in Guerrero family business and Chavo doesn’t like it. He is all about working over Chavo’s back and beating the piss out of him for the first several minutes. Eventually, Chavo has enough and beats Benoit down in the corner. Immediately after though, Benoit finds the CRIPPLER CROSSFACE only for Vickie to help put Chavo’s foot on the bottom rope to save the day. Chavo runs Benoit’s shoulder into the post to catch a break. Nice back suplex on Benoit gets two. Benoit escapes a wear down hold on the mat with a Samoan drop. He runs right into a dropkick though and Chavo starts telling him to stay out of his business. Benoit fires back with a Hat Trick of Germans. He heads up for the Swandive Headbutt. Vickie pulls on his leg and Benoit just disregards her weak attempt at stopping him. He flies, but misses as Chavo moves out of the way. Guerrero hits the Brainbuster and signals for the FROG SPLASH. He connects for 1-2-NO! Chavo starts yelling at Benoit instead of capitalizing. Benoit trips him up for the Sharpshooter, but Chavo kicks him off into Vickie. Schoolboy by Chavo gets 1-2-NO! As Benoit kicks out, his legs are wrapped around Chavo’s arm to follow through with the CRIPPLER CROSSFACE for the tapout. (8:23) A little on the short side, but still a good match. “Good” is the best you’ll get out of Chavo though. **½

In the back, Todd Grisham finds Edge & Lita. Lita says she is proud to beat Mickie James tonight and retire as the greatest women’s champion ever. Edge ~ “Mickie James is going to go down faster than Donovan McNabb!” Once Lita leaves to go get ready for her match, Cryme Tyme slips in Lita’s dressing room for a panty raid while Edge spouts off about how Team DX is gonna get HURT tonight! Once Edge leaves, they come out with the goods. Todd asks them what they’re doing, so they tell him he didn’t see NOTHING.

• WWE Women’s Championship: Lita (c) vs. Mickie James
  

Win, lose, or draw – Ross declares this Lita’s farewell match. Lawler gets in all the Lita is a whore jokes he’s got left in the tank throughout this match. Lita gets some heat on Mickie to start by slamming her face on the mat and driving in some knees. She delivers a cool Russian legsweep and a suplex for two-counts. She applies a sleeperhold and body scissors on Mickie, but Mickie finds the ropes. She misses a flying body press and Mickie heads up top, but gets brought down with a back suplex. Mickie wins a slugfest and connects with her Mick Kick combo. Cover, 1-2-NO! Fisherman suplex gets two as well. Lita shoves away the jumping DDT and blocks a headscissors to set up the LITASAULT~! Oh boy. Cover, 1-2-NO! She tries a leg swing DDT, but Mickie grabs the ropes to block. They trade quick nearfalls, but it takes the JUMPING TORNADO DDT from Mickie to score the pinfall and regain the women’s title. (8:19) After the match, Lita takes Lillian’s mic and rebukes the crowd for their disrespect. I mean, they did call her a “crack whore” at one point, so I would say that went a little far. Cryme Tyme interrupts and starts selling Lita’s bras and panties to the crowd. It’s a HO SALE, ya’ll. There was a box of Monistat and Lita’s “little buddy” in the box as well. Once it comes down to just the box, Cryme Tyme even sells that for $20! By the way, the match was a pretty decent send-off for Lita. Money, money – yeah, yeah. **½

Earlier today, Michael Cole sits down with Batista to ask him a bunch of ridiculous questions. Batista doesn’t answer ANY of them and then takes off his shades before he gives a rebuttal. He’s leaving tonight as World Heavyweight Champion.

• Survivor Series Elimination Match: Team DX (Triple H, Shawn Michaels, The Hardy Boyz & CM Punk) vs. Team Rated-RKO (Edge, Randy Orton, Johnny Nitro, Mike Knox & Gregory Helms) (w/Melina & Kelly Kelly)
  

Punk, Knox, and Kelly Kelly are all making their WWE PPV wrestling debuts. H eyes Kelly and asks her to get up on the apron and show him her boobies, but Mike Knox is not down with anybody noticing his girlfriend. He shoves Triple H back and then turns around into SWEET CHIN MUSIC from HBK for the first elimination at 0:40. Shawn goes over and asks his teammates who that was he just pinned. Haha, that’s great. Shawn runs the ropes with Nitro and then slides out and puts his arm around Melina to freak her out. Shawn gets back in and chops away on Nitro and then tags in Jeff Hardy. He hits the running sleeper drop and tags in Matt for their “tandem offense” as JR likes to call it for two. Nitro pulls Matt into the Team Rated-RKO corner as the heels tag in and out stomping away on Matt Hardy. After a minute or so of that, Matt comes back with a Side Effect on Johnny Nitro and makes the HOT TAG TO CM PUNK. He hits Nitro with some forearms and connects with the running knee and a bulldog. Punk finds the Uranage and applies the ANACONDA VICE for the tap-out at 4:58. Punk gets dominated by the heels for a bit. Orton trades some YAY-BOO blows with Punk and then delivers an RKO out of nowhere! Cover, 1-2-NO! Edge tags in and misses a SPEAR. Punk hot tags Triple H who hits his usual on everybody. Triple H goes for the PEDIGREE on Helms, but Edge breaks it up with an Edge-o-Matic. Shawn and Jeff come in and dump Orton and Edge to deliver STEREO PESCADOS! Meanwhile in the ring, Triple H ducks the SHINING WIZARD from Helms and gives him an AA spinebuster. A bloody-mouthed Matt tags in and delivers the TWIST OF FATE and then Jeff leaps off the top and hits the SWANTON BOMB to finish Helms at 9:26. We’re down to just Edge and Orton against the entire Team DX. The heels decide that it’s best to leave, but the Hardys bring them back into the ring and feed them to DX. Orton gets dumped while DX decimate Edge with Punk’s knee in the corner, the Hardy Boys hit the Poetry in Motion, and Shawn connects with SWEET CHIN MUSIC to pin Edge at 10:39. Once Orton realizes he’s all alone, he jumps the wall and runs, but Punk and the Hardys bring him back into the ring. The SWEET CHIN MUSIC leads to a PEDIGREE for the win. (11:33) Survivors: Team DX. Match was fun, but just another wankfest for DX. Like in the earlier elimination match, the eliminations came way too fast to make it possible to be a great match. ***

Backstage, MVP lets Mr. Kennedy know that he’s not mad that Kennedy fed him to Undertaker and Kane and that he’s got Kennedy’s back.

• First Blood Match: The Undertaker vs. Mr. Kennedy
  

Undertaker beats Kennedy all over the place early until Kennedy reverses a whip into the steel steps. Ouch, Taker took a nasty bump there. Kennedy pounds away on Taker and then leaps off the apron, but gets caught and driven spine-first into the ringpost. Back in, Taker places Kennedy in the corner and delivers a superplex. Kennedy goes low, but then runs into a boot. Taker works Kennedy over in the corner with body blows, but then Kennedy goes low again and rolls out to the floor. From all the body blows, we see that Kennedy is bleeding from the mouth. The ref doesn’t see any of this as MVP runs down and lets Kennedy spit in a towel. MVP tells Kennedy he doesn’t need this match and starts to take him to the back, but then turns Kennedy around and throws him back into the ring. Taker looks to bust Kennedy open in the corner, but Kennedy counters by dropping Taker face-first on the exposed turnbuckle. Kennedy drives Taker’s face into it one more time. Kennedy pounds away on Taker trying to bust him open just as MVP slides into the ring with a steel chair. Referee Charles Robinson fights over the chair even though there’s no rules and gets shoved out to the floor. MVP turns around and decks Taker with the chair! Well, that drew blood. Kennedy goes back to pounding on Taker’s forehead as Robinson gets back in the ring to see the blood pouring out of Taker’s head and calls for the bell. (9:25) Kennedy stays on top of Taker and continues his assault after the match. He motions with Taker’s blood on his hand for his microphone to come down from the ceiling. “And the winner of the match, Mr. Kenned-AGH!” Taker goozles him and beats the crap out of him down in the corner before picking up the chair and completely DESTROYING Mr. Kennedy with a chairshot to bust him open. When the Philadelphia crowd is impressed with a chairshot, the victim is probably stumbling around with a concussion. Taker beats on Kennedy some more and then gives him a TOMBSTONE PILEDRIVER. Taker still isn’t done, as he takes off a glove and punishes Kennedy with bare-knuckle shots. BONG! The post-match stuff was more entertaining than the actual match. *½

Over at Booker’s kingdom, Queen Sharmell gets King Booker’s mind ready for his title defense.

• Survivor Series Elimination Match: Team Cena (John Cena, Bobby Lashley, Kane, Rob Van Dam & Sabu) vs. Team Big Show (The Big Show, Test, MVP, Finlay & Umaga) (w/Hornswoggle & Armando Alejandro Estrada)
  

Cena starts this one with Umaga. When Cena clotheslines Umaga to the floor, Umaga loses his mind and tears up an announce table. Meanwhile in the ring, Finlay is getting beaten up by Team Cena. Umaga then brings a TV monitor into the ring and hits people to get DQ’ed at 0:56. That’s one way to keep his unpinned streak alive. Estrada manages to restrain his beast as they go back to the locker room. The heels get some heat on Van Dam. He starts to bleed from his mouth. That’s like the fourth match tonight for that to happen. RVD fights back on Finlay, MVP, and Test with kicks. Meanwhile, Kane goozles MVP for a CHOKESLAM. That allows Van Dam to go up top for the FIVE-STAR FROG SPLASH at 5:32. As soon as RVD stands up, he eats a YAKUZA KICK from Test to be sent back to the showers at 5:41. Sabu goes after Test, but Test takes him to the floor. Fortunately for Sabu, Bobby Lashley runs over Test with a SPEAR. Back inside, Sabu hits the slingshot legdrop followed by a Springboard Tornado DDT to take out Test at 6:20. Now it’s time for Show to get in the ring. He catches a springboard and sticks Sabu with a CHOKESLAM to eliminate him at 6:38. We get a standoff between Kane and Show. They goozle each other until Hornswoggle appears to distract everyone. Meanwhile, Finlay comes in and decks Kane with his shillelagh. CHOKESLAM to Kane! Show covers him for the pinfall at 7:17. So now we have Show and Finlay against Cena and Lashley. Show and Finlay start breaking down Cena on their side of town to set up a hot tag to Lashley. Finlay slips away from a running powerslam, but takes an exploder suplex for two. The match breaks down as Show double clotheslines Cena and Lashley. Hornswoggle gets picked up by Finlay, but Finlay has to chuck him to Cena while Lashley SPEARS Finlay down. Lashley covers Finlay to pin him at 10:30. Cena wanted to FU Hornswoggle, but Show boots down Cena. Now Lashley and Cena start double-teaming Show leading to the double suplex. Cena hits the Five-Knuckle Shuffle. Show goozles him for his last ditch effort to stop the man, but Lashley SPEARS Show back into the ropes. Cena grabs Show and uses his momentum to hoist him up onto his shoulders to deliver the FU for the win. (12:36) Survivors: John Cena and Bobby Lashley. Cena is one strong MF’er, ladies and gents. This was more fun than I remembered. Still nothing to go crazy over. **½

Before the match, Smackdown GM Teddy Long comes down and announces that if Batista loses tonight, he will not receive any more World title shots. That should tell you right there who’s going to win. Also, King Booker can lose the belt by countout or disqualification.

• World Heavyweight Championship: King Booker (c) (w/Queen Sharmell) vs. Batista
  

Bats attacks Booker before the bell. What a swell guy. After a minute or two of that, they finally get in the ring as the bell sounds. Batista hits a back elbow for two. Booker kicks back at Batista, then they take turns beating on each other in the corner. Batista brings Booker out of the corner and delivers a suplex. Batista sets up for the DEMON BOMB, but Booker avoids and rolls out to the floor. They blow a hotshot on the apron followed by a backbreaker by Batista for two. Batista hits a pair of short-arm clotheslines for another two. Booker comes back with a hotshot and then catapults Batista throat-first into the bottom rope. Booker hits a superkick for two. Booker proceeds to hammer Batista down in the corner. He whips Batista into the opposite corner and follows him in with a clothesline. Batista regains control with a side slam for two. Batista Jackhammer gets another two. Booker tries to fight back, but then he runs into a Black Hole Slam for two. Next, they fight on the apron where Batista gets kicked off into the security wall. Booker follows him out and smashes Batista’s face into the steel steps. Back in, Booker covers for two. Booker hits the Harlem sidekick for two. Booker hooks a chinlock, but Batista powers out and catches Booker in a belly-to-belly suplex. Batista starts seething and delivers a bunch of clotheslines. He boots Booker out to ringside and then throws Booker into the steps. Back in, Batista heads up top and hits a flying shoulder tackle for 1-2-NO! Batista connects with a Spinebuster for another nearfall. Booker ducks a clothesline and delivers the BOOK END for 1-2-NO! Booker goes for the SCISSORS KICK, but Batista blocks with a boot and hits the DEMON BOMB! He covers for 1-2-NO! Booker grabs the bottom rope. While Batista argues the count, Sharmell sneaks Booker the World title belt and then distracts the ref. Batista comes over and wants to give her a DEMON BOMB, but tosses her aside instead. Her crown NEVER comes off! Batista ducks a belt shot and nails Booker in the face with the belt instead all with the ref’s back turned. Batista covers Booker and regains the world title. (13:58) I don’t think these two should ever wrestle again, by the way. *½

Final Thoughts: While most of the matches at least hit the average-to-good plateau, many of the booking decisions were puzzling. What’s worse is that virtually everyone who lost, lost in a way that protected their reps except for the guys who actually needed it. Unless you’re a massive Batista mark, this was just more filler in a series of filler PPVs. Completely forgettable PPV here. Thumbs down for Survivor Series 2006.