WCW: Monday Nitro
November 9, 1998
Uniondale, NY
Nassau Coliseum

The current WCW champs are as follows:
WCW World Champion: Bill Goldberg (7/6/1998)
WCW U.S. Champion: Diamond Dallas Page (10/26/1998)
WCW World Tag Team Champions: Rick Steiner & Kenny Kaos (10/26/1998)
WCW World Television Champion: Chris Jericho (8/10/1998)
WCW Cruiserweight Champion: Billy Kidman (9/14/1998)

Right off the freaking bat we get a SUPER patriotic start to the show because Hollywood Hogan – the guy WCW has vilified as an evil human being for the past 2+ years has announced he’s running for POTUS – and we really want to encourage that. I tell ya, Jesse Ventura becoming the new Governor of Minnesota might actually have been the worst thing to happen to wrestling because wrestling never knows when to quit – and this is a perfect example of that. Since they haven’t had much major “media attention” over the past couple months, they have clearly missed it.

HOUR NUMBER ONE! Your hosts are Tony Schiavone, Mike Tenay, and Larry Zbyszko.

Tony is excited tonight for this show that sold out in three hours. He also mentions that the POTUS is en route to the Nassau Coliseum who will be joining us. I’m really interested to see where *that* goes. Not only will Hollywood Hogan be addressing the audience over his run for the biggest office in the land, but he’ll be announcing his running mate. Lots of rumors on that.

NITRO GIRLS~!

Gene Okerlund and Bobby Heenan are out back waiting for the arrival of the POTUS. Okerlund mentions he got this tip about the POTUS coming from a source in the nWo B&W. Okay, well that doesn’t seem like a source Gene should trust. When two limos pull up, Kevin Nash and Konnan get out of one car while the Giant and Scott Hall come out the other car.  Nash splits off with Hall while Giant stomps the crap out of Konnan.

They take us back to last Monday when Bret Hart attacked Chris Benoit and reinjured the guy’s elbow with a Kimura lock. Later on in the show, the Giant saved Bret Hart from a Lex Luger beating. Even later in the show, Bret saves the Giant from a Torture Rack and Bret attacks Luger’s knee with a piece of guardrail.

They take us back even further to Halloween Havoc when Bret Hart took Sting’s ball bat and hit him while he was already unconscious. WHAT A BASTARD.

• Juventud Guerrera vs. Kaz Hayashi

Tenay says this is a rematch from Saturday Night where Juventud got a hard win. While Hayashi and Guerrera go through a bunch of reversals, ERIC BISCHOFF walks over to the announce table with a mic and gives his word that the POTUS will be here tonight. He calls Gene Okerlund a “bald piece of garbage” because no one will want to miss what’s coming. Back in the ring, Hayashi stops a dive off the top with a missile dropkick and Juventud rolls out to regroup. We get some AGGRESSION from Hayashi as he whips Guerrera into the guardrail. Hayashi delivers his twisting plancha which is pretty awesome. Back inside, Hayashi cuts off Juventud with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. He keeps Guerrera down and stretches him for a bit. Hayashi wins a chop battle and puts the boots to him in the corner as we go to commercial. When we return, Guerrera catches Hayashi with a spinning heel kick and a tilt-a-whirl headscissors that takes him to the floor. Juventud goes to the outside with a springboard dive. Now Guerrera makes Hayashi pay with a hard whip into the guardrail. Back in again, Hayashi runs Guerrera down with a clothesline and returns to his methodical offense. He hits a nice brainbuster for two. Juventud blocks a dropkick and delivers a reverse suplex onto the top rope. He tries to powerbomb Hayashi, but Hayashi counters with a sunset flip. They go back and forth for nearfalls. Next thing we know, here comes Ernest Miller and Sonny Oono to ruin the match. Juventud delivers a flying headscissors and calls for the Juvi Driver, but Hayashi slips away and rolls him up. While Miller distracts ref Charles Robinson, Oono kicks Hayashi backwards and Juventud ends up on top for the three-count. (12:33) Not a huge fan, but it does set up further problems between Hayashi and Oono and also continues Juventud down the road to reclaiming the Cruiserweight title. I wonder how he’s going to fit into the LWO storyline as well. Hayashi showed some fire and seemed to be able to hang with Juventud, but I felt like his heel work could have been better. ***¼

NITRO GIRLS~!

Send in your Nitro Party tapes!

They take us back to two weeks ago when Scott Hall and the Giant threw Kevin Nash through a wall.

• Alex Wright vs. Barry Horowitz

Wright gets Dave Penzer to tell the crowd to be silent during his match so he can have concentrate on beating Horowitz. Technically this is a rematch from two weeks ago. We see a “secret service man” walk past the camera on the floor. Larry Z doesn’t care as long as they aren’t IRS guys. Wright is taking too long to beat Horowitz, so the nWo Wolfpac (only three of them now) head out to break up the match. (about 3:00) N/R

The nWo Wolfpac run through their weekly catchphrases. What I would pay to hear Lex say, “AND IF YOU AIN’T DOWN WITH THAT, WE GOT TWO WORDS FOR YA.” They are growing weary of the nWo B&W crew. Nash challenges Hall, Lex wants Bret, and Konnan doesn’t seem to care who he faces as long as the person is wearing a black and white t-shirt. ERIC BISCHOFF walks out (n! W! o!) and says he’s going to make sure they get what they ask for tonight on his show. Why is Nash calling him “Estrogen boy”? Other than just seeing that as an insult, does anybody know? Is that like an early incarnation of “soy boy”?

• IWGP Heavyweight Championship: Scott Norton (c) (w/Vincent) vs. Lodi

Vincent gets to carry the Japanese gold. Can you imagine Vincent holding a title in New Japan? Lodi is in huge trouble. This is clearly just a reason to get some footage of Norton destroying somebody in WCW. The POWERBOMB ends Lodi in :20.

Since Gene Okerlund is still out back waiting for Bill Clinton, Tony Schiavone is in the ring and brings out the Disciple to talk. While he brags about being his own man fighting his own battles, Horace Hogan, Stevie Ray and Vincent surround the guy. Horace tells him to shut his stinking mouth. He insults the crowd and talks smack to Disciple for turning on Uncle Hulk – the guy who MADE wrestling what it is today. Disciple tells Horace to take his stooges and make like a tree and leave. Naturally, Horace knocks him down and uses Hulk’s weightlifting belt against Disciple. We see some smoke rise over by the entrance ramp. I don’t like the look of that. Disciple fights back, but it’s just inevitable that he gets triple-teamed. We hear some music and it’s the WARRIOR running down for the save – just like it’s WrestleMania 8! Well, not really. They cut it short and go to commercial before it goes too far.

HOUR NUMBER TWO! Your hosts are Tony Schiavone, Mike Tenay, and Larry Zbyszko.

We check in with Gene Okerlund and Bobby Heenan out back. There’s a motorcade coming to the building with loads of security around a limo with US flags on it. It’s gotta be Bill! Somebody hide Fyre please! The Secret Service guys tell Gene and Bobby to step the F back. Still no sign of Bill, but our fingers are crossed. Oh wait, they cut to the back again. We see a swarm of people pushing the cameraman back. We can’t see a darn thing.

Hold up, “Hail to the Chief” gets played throughout the building. Tony talks Larry Z and Tenay into standing up for the POTUS. Obviously, it’s not Bill Clinton, it’s HOLLYWOOD HOGAN, brothers. He’s got the black and white boas, some awesome white shades, and an ugly New York Yankees beanie. He walks halfway down the aisle with Eric Bischoff and a whole mess of security guys before an American flag drops from the ceiling. There’s a ticker tape parade and red white and blue balloons coming down as well. Our esteemed commentators can’t BELIEVE they have been scammed again by the nWo. Bischoff announces Hogan as the next President of the United States. Gene has made his way to the ring to hold the microphone. Hogan congratulates Jesse Ventura for becoming the new elected Governor of Minnesota. The people of Minnesota voted for a REAL man and he’s set a new standard for professional wrestling. Hogan politicks that he’s going to give America a “brand new start” for the new millennium. Gene asks Hulk if he enjoys a good cigar, but Hogan comes back saying he doesn’t smoke. Wow. Tony does his best Richard M. Nixon impression as we go to break.

We watch the Nitro Girls go shopping in Las Vegas.

NITRO GIRLS~!

WCW/nWo Revenge for N64 ad airs. It’s only $70 bucks!

Bret Hart comes out to the ring as they replay Bret putting Diamond Dallas Page in a Sharpshooter after losing the U.S. title two weeks ago on Nitro. Bret runs down the list of people he’s put on the shelf recently – namely Sting and Diamond Dallas Page. He’s done wrestling Lex Luger, but he’s fine with taking on Konnan tonight. Good luck, Konnan. Did Bret just threaten the Nitro Girls?

• Eddie Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio Jr.

Bobby Heenan replaces Larry Z for the rest of the show.  Eddie is all by himself, so his LWO are conspicuous by their absence. He’s still trying to force Rey into joining the crew. Rey delivers a quebrada into an armdrag to send Eddie to the floor. Back in, Mysterio catches Eddie with a satellite headscissors and again Eddie is on the floor. Back in again, Eddie kicks the bad knee and now Rey is in trouble. Our esteemed commentators continue to discuss Hollywood Hogan’s “presidential run”. They run through different spots, but they all wind up going back to Guerrero damaging the knee. At one point, Guerrero gets a nearfall with a top-rope headscissors. He applies a spinning toe hold Dory Funk Jr style, but Mysterio counters with an inside cradle for two. Back to the knee for Eddie. Tenay picks Bret Hart as the winner of the World War 3 battle royal. We’re two weeks out and we still don’t know DDP will be wrestling Bret Hart in a match. This is sadly just a dull match to get the commentators to build the PPV. Rey headscissors Eddie again on one knee and hits a desperate tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for two. Eddie dropkicks the bad knee and delivers a Hilo on it. On the floor, Guerrero sandwiches Rey’s knee between the steel steps and the ringpost for a dropkick. Oh boy, he’s done. Eddie takes Mysterio back inside the ring and goes to the kneebar. The crowd is getting antsy. Rey catches a corner charge and launches Eddie into the corner. Bronco Buster is followed by a split-legged moonsault for two. Flying X-Factor catches Eddie as Rey’s comeback continues. An inverted Pedigree from Rey gets another nearfall. Guerrero explodes on Rey with a throwaway suplex. Here comes CHAVO GUERRERO JR with his pal Pepe. Eddie applies a leg submission. While Chavo is on the apron, Eddie lets go of Rey and asks him what he’s doing. Rey of course shoves Eddie into Chavo knocking him off the apron to the guardrail and rolls up Eddie for the three-count. (12:38) The worst of all Rey/Eddie matches. They have made a liar out of me because last week I said these two would always have at least a *** match, but I don’t think this was very good at all. They were running through the motions and didn’t seem motivated at all. Afterwards, the LWO attacks Chavo, but Eddie gets them to stop and Rey pulls Chavo out to safety. **

We catch Konnan’s new music video we saw on Thunder last week.

Eric Bischoff and Elizabeth head out to the ring. Eric announces that Ric Flair won’t be wrestling because he couldn’t pass a physical. In fact, they tried to jumpstart his pace maker and there’s no blood pressure. That’s just the way it is when you’re Ric Flair’s age. As for JJ Dillon fining Scott Steiner and Buff Bagwell, Eric has a problem with that. Bischoff brings out a nerd controller and some suits to get this fine reversed. The crowd doesn’t care about any of this. Bischoff kicks around these geeks and punches the shit out of one of them. The only thing Bischoff hates more than controllers are attorneys. And that’s that. Why didn’t he just veto the decision and force the controller to give Scott and Buff their money back? WHY DOES EVERYTHING HAVE TO BE VIOLENT?

HOUR NUMBER THREE! Your hosts are Tony Schiavone, Mike Tenay, and Bobby Heenan.

They replay what happened between Scott Steiner and JJ Dillon from last week on Nitro. It seems like that should have been played prior to the last segment, but here we are.

Next up, we get more video footage of the “Uncontrollable” Scott Steiner. Almost seems like he needs a controller, doesn’t it. HA.

• Scott Steiner (w/Buff Bagwell) vs. Chris Adams

Ref Mickey Jay tells announcer Dave Penzer that he refuses to ref any Scott Steiner matches because it’s “unsafe working environment”. After Scott and Buff talk about how big and bad they are, there’s an open challenge made to the locker room. Umm, the 43 year-old CHRIS ADAMS answers the call. And boy, you can imagine how pumped the fans are to see Chris Adams tonight. Buff has a good laugh over Adams. You can also imagine how well this goes for Adams. Heenan picks Scott Steiner to win WW3. As Scott applies the STEINER RECLINER, RICK STEINER runs down and chases off the bad guys. (1:15) He wants to find a partner and give them a shot at the WCW tag belts – TONIGHT. N/R

Another video look at the Nitro Girls.

Naturally, NITRO GIRLS~!

We get a video package for Lex Luger as a top pick to win WW3.

Tony hypes Nitro Xtra tomorrow night at 8PM EST on TNT.

• WCW World Tag Team Championship: Rick Steiner & Judy Bagwell (c) vs. Scott Steiner & Buff Bagwell

There’s no referee because it’s a Scott Steiner match, so whatever. Rick and Judy both duck shots from Scott and Buff and return fire. This is just nonsense. Scott and Buff wind up leaving because there’s no referee. Looks like Scott threatens to slap Judy the next time she shows herself around here. Buff tells his momma to keep her nose out of his business because she knows who pays the bills. This match will now be happening at the PPV. CAN’T WAIT. N/R

• Bret Hart vs. Konnan

This is not a matchup I thought I would see, but here we are. Konnan is getting hotter every week and Bret is certainly a hot heel right now. He sells Konnan’s terrible punches to start. The Rolling Lariat connects and Konnan continues to put the boots to Bret. He follows Bret out to the floor for some guardrail violence. Bret goes to the eyes and brings Konnan back inside to continue to begin breaking down Konnan. There’s a headbutt to the groin and rakes Konnan’s head on the top rope. He delivers a Russian legsweep and tries his flying elbow, but Konnan brings up the boot to block. Not much of a fiery comeback by Konnan. The referee becomes a nuisance getting in Konnan’s way and Bret clips Konnan from behind. He takes Konnan to school and wraps the knee around the ringpost. The attack on Konnan’s knee continues until Bret finds a chair and beats the crap out of Konnan’s knee for the DQ. (7:06) Ring the bell all you want, Bret doesn’t care. LEX LUGER runs out and chases Bret away. Konnan gets help from WCW referees and does a borderline stretcher job. If Konnan was your pick to win WW3, well then you’re an idiot. ¾*

Gene Okerlund seems excited to bring out the WCW TV champ Chris Jericho. The Lionheart’s mane is looking pretty insane these days. Ralphus is here as his Jericho’s security guard. Pretty hilarious watching Jericho direct Ralphus around. Jericho was born in Long Island and he’s glad he left since this place sucks. Greenberg – 4, Jericho – 0. He knows Goldberg isn’t in the building because Ralphus told him so and Jericho trusts him with his life. It seems Goldberg isn’t man enough to show up. Well, it appears backstage that Goldberg has arrived to the building. We catch Goldberg taking a look at the monitor while Jericho is yapping. He’s so mad, he starts throwing the furniture apart in his dressing room. Once he’s done, GOLDBERG heads to the ring and SPEARS Jericho out of his boots in the aisle. Goldberg then rips off the Jericholic t-shirt and throws him into the guardrail as he leaves him laying a broken man. Is this the end of the Goldberg-Jericho feud? Because the feared BOBBY DUNCUM JR. is on his way! SCARY!

• Kevin Nash & Lex Luger vs. The Giant & Scott Hall

Hall throws the toothpick in Nash’s face and the nWo B&W think it’s the funniest thing ever, so Nash spits in Hall’s eyes. HILARIOUS! Nash forces Hall to the corner and does the things he does in the corner. You know. Hall escapes the Snake Eyes and takes Nash from corner to corner, but runs into an elbow. Nash short-arm clotheslines Hall and tags in Luger. Apparently he doesn’t see it and gets the double bicep pose from Lex. There’s an inverted atomic drop and a running clothesline. Hall goes to the eyes and tags Giant to give Lex a giant ass beating. Luger catches Giant charging in the corner and forces him back for a ten-count corner punch. Hall tries to jump him from behind and Lex leaps on top of Hall. Of course, there’s nothing he can do when Giant runs him over with a clothesline. Giant headbutts the nuts and then picks up Luger for a slam. He lands a jumping elbow drop and tags out to Hall. Heenan busts Tenay’s chops for being so corny about a “giant elbow drop”. Crowd is actually still awake for this match and cheers on the nWo Wolfpac. Hall gets caught with a jawbreaker, but he’s able to tag out again. Luger remains on the wrong side of town. Giant steps on Lex’s chest and elbow drops the knee. Tomorrow night on Nitro Xtra, you’ll see GOLDBERG! Back over to Hall, he gives Luger a discus right hand and puts the boots to him. Here comes the Fallaway Slam. Giant wants Hall to give Luger the Outsider’s Edge. Luger backdrops him over and takes his time setting up the HOT TAG TO NASH! Bossman straddle to Hall and the Big Boot follows. In comes the Giant, he runs into Luger who clotheslines him to the floor. As Nash goes for the Jackknife Powerbomb on Hall, BRET HART runs in and clips the knee for the DQ. (9:12) He starts going to work on Nash’s knee – and Hall joins in on the fun. Luger runs Giant into the ringpost and grabs a chair to get rid of Hall and Bret. THE DAMAGE IS DONE! *½

DON’T FORGET ABOUT NITRO XTRA TOMORROW NIGHT AT 8PM. Because what this show needs is to be LONGER.

Until next time, so long for now.

WCW/NWO PRESENT: WORLD WAR 3
LIVE on PPV from the Palace of Auburn Hills in Auburn Hills, Michigan on November 22!
MAIN EVENT: 60-Man, 3-Ring Battle Royal – Winner faces the WCW world champion at Starrcade on December 27
WCW World Tag Team Championship: Rick Steiner (c) & Judy Bagwell vs. Scott Steiner & Buff Bagwell