February 19, 2007
Bakersfield, CA
Rabobank Arena

The current WWE champions are as follows:
WWE Champion: John Cena (9/17/2006)
WWE Intercontinental Champion: Jeff Hardy (11/13/2006)
World Tag Team Champions: John Cena & Shawn Michaels (1/29/2007)
WWE Women’s Champion: Mickie James (11/26/2006)

FLASHBACK TO LAST WEEK: Donald Trump showed up to challenge Vince McMahon to a match because he didn’t like being mocked over the Rosie O’Donnell situation on the RAW after the Royal Rumble. Knowing what a horrible match that would be, Vince doesn’t take the bait and proposes they find representatives to wrestle each other instead. Trump must think that’s one of the worst deals he’s ever seen and adds the hair match stipulation. McMahon doesn’t trust Trump as far as he can throw him, but accepts the terms anyways. THE MATCH IS ON!

Your hosts are Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler.

Vince McMahon struts out to the ring to start the show. There’s a makeshift barber shop set up in the ring. In 41 days at WrestleMania 23, Donald Trump walks into Vince’s yard. Vince talks about how bad he’s going to beat up Donald Trump. He wants another billionaire like Trump to beg him not to shave his head. When that happens, McMahon will tell him it’s just too damn bad. He knows what a pair of scissors is, but forgets what clippers are. Vince then recovers saying that Trump can find solace in knowing that baldness seems to be “en vogue” these days. I mean, after all Britney Spears is now bald. Vince puts up some before and after pictures of Britney up on the TitanTron. He then starts to mock Trump with all kinds of photoshopped silly haircuts. None of those haircuts will happen because Trump is going to be bald after WrestleMania. Vince now introduces the man who will represent him at WrestleMania: UMAGA~! He and his handler Armando Alejandro Estrada come out to the ring to join Vince. Estrada says it will be considered an honor for Umaga to represent Vince at WrestleMania. Vince then rewards Umaga with an Intercontinental title match – RIGHT NOW.

  • WWE Intercontinental Championship: Jeff Hardy (c) vs. Umaga (w/Armando Alejandro Estrada)

We are JIP as the match started during the commercial break. Hardy is busy getting Umaga to the floor and hitting him with running dropkick through the ropes. He tries a pescado and gets caught, but avoids being thrown into the ringpost and sends Umaga into the post instead. Hardy runs down the barricade only to get punched in the throat on the way down. Back inside, Umaga picks up Hardy just to knock him back down again. He grabs a nerve hold and when Hardy tries to fight up, Umaga knocks him back down again. Flying Headbutt misses and Hardy hits Whisper in the Wind for only a one-count! Umaga fires back with a Samoan Drop, delivers the Buttalanche, and drills Hardy with the SAMOAN SPIKE for the win. (5:44 shown) And Umaga’s destruction of this roster continues. Vince comes out to the ramp and gives Umaga the thumbs up double-meaning. **

  • Ric Flair & Carlito (w/Torrie Wilson) vs. Lance Cade & Trevor Murdoch

Two weeks ago on RAW, Flair had cut a great promo on Carlito saying he had no respect or passion for this business as Carlito and Torrie were leaving the building laughing and carrying on after being cheated out of his match. If it were today, Carlito would need a safe space after that promo. However, Carlito seems to want Flair’s respect and he’s out to prove Flair wrong. After Flair and Carlito get some shine on Cade, Carlito plays face-in-peril. Murdoch cranks on Carlito’s neck for a bit. He tries coming off the second rope and Carlito brings his boot up. Murdoch catches the boot, but then misses an elbow drop to set up the hot tag to Flair. WOO! Chops everywhere. Cade interrupts the Figure-Four, but gets caught coming off the top rope. As JR says, it’s hard to hide when you’re Lance Cade. Flair and Carlito clothesline him out of the ring. While Carlito distracts the ref, Flair low blows the crap out of Murdoch. He tags in Carlito and Murdoch gets the BACKCRACKER for the three-count. (4:29) Fun, simple formulaic tag match. I like this angle, but it just stinks of a heel turn coming. *½

When we return, Todd Grisham meets with the tag champs and WrestleMania 23 opponents Shawn Michaels and John Cena. The reason they were successful at No Way Out against the Undertaker and Batista was because their whole story is that Shawn Michaels will do everything in his power to make sure nothing prevents John Cena from going to WrestleMania. Unlike Bats and Taker, they know exactly where they stand with each other. It starts to get real serious, but then Shawn Michaels swerves us to hype the “New and Improved DX” set that drops February 20. Cena gives HBK some shilling advice as he promotes “The Marine” on DVD. Big Dick Johnson shows up and eats some Sweet Chin Music. Cena then thanks Shawn for having his back.

Elsewhere, Randy Orton tells Edge that they have a rematch next week against John Cena and Shawn Michaels to get their tag titles back. After Orton gets through with Cena tonight, it will be a cake walk. Edge hypes himself up as he prepares for his Money in the Bank qualifying match saying he will make history starting tonight by winning MITB again at WrestleMania 23 and regaining the WWE title. Orton doesn’t seem to like that plan very much.

  • Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Rob Van Dam vs. Edge

Here we have the first two MITB winners. Feeling out process to start. Van Dam sends Edge scurrying to the floor after a monkey flip. Commercials! When we return, RVD is working on the arm. After Edge escapes the armbar, he gets thrown to the floor to be draped on the barricade for the spinning heel kick from the apron. VINTAGE RVD! Edge kicks Van Dam in the face on the way back in and gives him a swinging neckbreaker through the ropes. Another neckbreaker gets two. When Van Dam can’t escape a chinlock by reaching the ropes with his feet, he kicks Edge in the face. Van Dam mounts a comeback with signature kicks and goes for Rolling Thunder, but Edge shoots up and powerslam him in mid-air. Cover, 1-2-NO! Edge wants a top rope superplex, but Van Dam feels differently and dumps Edge on the top rope to kick him down to the floor. RVD then wipes out Edge with a pescado. He comes flying back inside the ring, but Edge dropkicks him on the way down for two. RVD leapfrogs the SPEAR and kicks Edge down for the Split-Legged Moonsault for 1-2-NO! The Stepover Heel Kick leads to the Five Star Frog Splash, but here comes Randy Orton for the distraction. After Van Dam kicks him off the apron, RVD stands up and turns around into the SPEAR. Cover, 1-2-3. (10:38 shown) Good match! Van Dam looked great here, but Edge is heading to WrestleMania 23. ***¼

WWE SLAM OF THE WEEK (brought to you by Skittles): Thursday Raw Thursday, 2/15/07. Melina got the better of WWE Women’s champ Mickie James in a mixed-tag match – with a handful of tights.

  • WWE Women’s Championship: Mickie James (c) vs. Melina

Melina looks determined and confident here. Quite the strong tie-up here. They don’t just push each other around, they also throw each other down by the hair. Melina counters a headlock into a hammerlock, but then Mickie elbows out and flips her down. Mickie catches Melina with a clothesline and snapmares her down for a dropkick to the chops. As Melina rolls to the ropes, Mickie baseball slides her out to the floor. Melina sidesteps another baseball slide and yanks Mickie to the floor. Back in, Melina has got some KNEES for Mickie’s face. To make matters even worse for Mickie, Melina delivers a brutal curb stomp. She really is SoCal. As Mickie finds a corner, she trips up Melina and starts pounding on her face. They roll around on the mat exchanging forearms. Mickie starts tossing Melina around by her hair and then finds a Thesz Press. Mickie goes for the headscissors out of the corner, but gets dumped on her head. With a jackknife cover, Melina picks up the win and the Women’s title. (4:22) Not sure that was supposed to be the finish or not. Melina has the paparazzi snapping pictures of her celebration. Good up until the finish. Not sure if Mickie got hurt there or not. No Johnny Nitro and I think that was a good move. **

After the break, Mickie James is being consoled by Maria and Candice over her loss. Like a total dick, Todd Grisham sticks his microphone in Mickie’s face wanting a word. She doesn’t want to talk right now. When Grisham won’t shut up, she slaps him across the chops. I need to make a GIF of that.

  • HaHHandicap Match: The Great Khali vs. The Highlanders

WHERE IS KHALI’S HANDLER? I think you know how this goes. Khali gives Robbie the TREE SLAM and figuratively executes him at 1:31.

Some members of the cast from the movie “Grind House” are at RAW here tonight.

They replay bits and pieces of Vince McMahon’s promo from the start of the show. Umaga is revealed as his representative to face Donald Trump’s representative who will be named next week.

In the back, Raw GM Jonathan Coachman is shown talking to Kenny Dykstra when the Great Khali appears. He wants better competition. And that’s all he has to say about that. Ron Simons makes a cameo. He feels for Coach.

There’s a vignette advertising Ashley and her Playboy cover that drops March 12.

Some strange interviewer guy I don’t recognize tries to speak with the *new* WWE Women’s champ Melina when Johnny Nitro comes over to congratulate her. It’s time to leave and go party in LA. As he leaves to go put the bubbly on ice in the limo, Melina is pissed about Ashley having her video played before her big interview. Playboy begged Melina to pose for them, but the world doesn’t deserve to see her like that. Hey, Melina gets it. Her outfits never leave much to the imagination, but she leaves just enough to make her hotter than the Playboy chicks. All the attention should be on the *new* WWE women’s champ, not some skank in a magazine.

Mr. Perfect is going into the Hall of Fame this year. We got a vignette of all his great vignettes.

WRESTLEMANIA RECALL: The WrestleMania 1 main event.

Next week on RAW: Donald Trump’s representative will be announced. Plus, the world tag belts will be on the line as John Cena and Shawn Michaels defend against Rated RKO.

  • John Cena vs. Randy Orton

This is actually only the second time these two have face each other in a 1-on-1 meeting on RAW. Their first meeting was on the Eddie Guerrero tribute show back in November 2005. Pretty sure Cena could have any woman he wanted in this audience tonight. They take turns doing the collar and elbow tie-up. Orton stomps Cena down into a corner, but then Cena fights right back and delivers the fisherman’s suplex. Orton thumbs the eye and stomps Cena some more, but Cena reverses a whip and delivers a hiptoss. He slams Orton and drops an elbow for two. Orton avoids a corner charge and hits a clothesline for two. Cena gives Orton a bulldog, but then they double-KO each other. Orton rolls out and grabs a chair. VIOLENCE IS COMING. This builds great tension for a commercial break. When we return, Orton has Cena in a chinlock. Ha! During the break, Orton sent Cena into the steps to take control. Cena fights out, but whiffs on a crossbody block. As Cena rolls to the ropes, Orton grabs him for the DDT through the ropes. Cena looks out! Orton covers for two. He punches Cena down in the corner and once he’s down, Orton gives him the Garvin Stomp. Jumping knee drop adds the exclamation point for two. Back to the VINTAGE ORTON chinlock. Cena eventually powers out using those massive triceps. Orton dishes out some punches, but Cena channels Sting from 1992 and starts no-selling what Orton is dishing out. Clotheslines, shoulderblocks, Protobomb, and the Five Knuckle Shuffle ensues. Orton claws Cena’s eyes to avoid the FU and dropkicks him down. He comes off the top with a flying bodypress, but Cena rolls through for 1-2-NO! Orton stuns Cena with the Inverted Backbreaker and calls for the RKO, but Cena shoves that away. As he goes for the FU again, Edge appears and SPEARS Cena for the DQ. (10:12 shown) Edge wants to Conchairto Cena, but Shawn Michaels makes the save and wallops Rated RKO with the chair. He draws back the chair and looks at Cena, but doesn’t pull the trigger. Ya know, make Cena think a little bit. Fun main event that sets up next week’s main event really well. ***¼

WWE is on a roll right now. I know we’re only in February, but I can’t believe how much better 2007 is from 2006.

I’m probably not going to mess with ECW this week. However, I will be doing all three go-home shows for WrestleMania 23 at the end of March, so that should be fun and will be our next stop on the Ten Years After series. Until next time, so long for now.


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